tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-8203944661512606582024-02-08T02:01:46.416+00:00teacups, cupcakesBeckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.comBlogger337125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-56475606939943775552019-03-12T18:58:00.000+00:002019-03-12T20:28:50.621+00:00I've come to know the friends around you / are all you'll always have<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgogERj_MnQEMOAAmQdxiApqE-reS_Gsnx3poWv4wa8XfC8e1QLfqAJhqey2zcTdWOQrzeZDhWGva1D1DQyzAlUVurbNCRdqm3ZYGIE8MApZ4cfYNt6r4Y0tPxbp9AVLBnXB_DfUS2Xqhvp/s1600/20190308_172502.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgogERj_MnQEMOAAmQdxiApqE-reS_Gsnx3poWv4wa8XfC8e1QLfqAJhqey2zcTdWOQrzeZDhWGva1D1DQyzAlUVurbNCRdqm3ZYGIE8MApZ4cfYNt6r4Y0tPxbp9AVLBnXB_DfUS2Xqhvp/s1600/20190308_172502.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">C, a friend from university, sends me <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2019/jan/13/ella-risbridger-john-underwood-friendship-life-new-family">Ella Risbridger’s article</a> about friends who are more than friends, friends who are family. And it sums up so perfectly how I have felt about the vast net of friends that pushed and pulled and cajoled me through the second half of 2018, that my eyes well up with tears reading it on the number 36 bus.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I should say, from the outset, this: that the three others in my small quartet of a family were invaluable. S, who as the first person I called, that terrible, terrible May evening, said <i>I’m coming over, I am leaving right now</i> and who (metaphorically at least) has not left my side since. My mother, who messaged me without fail every single morning, with a simple <i>hi</i> or an emoji wave, to let me know she was awake, so I could then call her, wail down the phone for ten minutes before I was able to shower, dress, begin the day ahead. My father who on random week nights when I found myself alone but not wanting to be accompanied me to the cinema, or took me for pizza, told me tales of his own past heartbreak, and how we do all eventually wade through it. So, those family three were there, in a bottomless, unconditional way, and I do not take that for granted, because not everyone is as lucky to have family like that (and in the flip reverse of friends who are more than friends, that are family, I am truly grateful that I also have family who I also count as friends).</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">But now to the friends. They are a wide ranging bunch. The few remaining school friends who knew me when I wore a bottle green blazer, nose buried in a Harry Potter book. The glorious, tumbling pack that is the uni crowd, years of nights out and library studying and housewarmings and weddings providing layer upon layer of shared experience and in-jokes. The Kinshasa alumni who, in as much as we all wind each other up and know exactly how to push one another’s buttons and lived in each other’s pockets throughout our expat time, are genuinely like an extended mass of siblings and cousins. And all the others in between – the incredible women I’ve held onto from the Shoreditch Sister days, the London work colleagues (non-Kinshasa) who have turned to friends, the adopted friends of friends who have become standalone friends in their own right. I think of all of these friends, and everything they did, whilst reading the Risbridger article, and think yes, yes.</span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx4BdOqtcCTnsI7XINgqcgX2kucDPuIrDOGpHgUVcZar8Vpsz7J4C_MXZdgl6T9-j8lZRIrEmLE9t9l-0IKMukA79sC1VpoalFbVHQ-u5Wth7MrTxJLYFlbTtGpWpZg9vaLIdCUzIDK069/s1600/20190308_173232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgx4BdOqtcCTnsI7XINgqcgX2kucDPuIrDOGpHgUVcZar8Vpsz7J4C_MXZdgl6T9-j8lZRIrEmLE9t9l-0IKMukA79sC1VpoalFbVHQ-u5Wth7MrTxJLYFlbTtGpWpZg9vaLIdCUzIDK069/s1600/20190308_173232.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">They incorporated a shell-shocked husk of me into their family holiday in Greece. Gave me a bed and a room and fed me incredible </span><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">home cooked</span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"> dishes with peppers and courgettes from the garden, salty local feta. Let me doze for hours on a sun lounger above the warm sand, rousing myself only to immerse myself in the water. Let me read to their children and float with them on giant inflatable dinosaurs in a calm salty sea. They took me in again, a slightly less broken me, to an autumnal Washington. Bought me maple cupcakes, walked with me through Halloween decorated streets, pumpkins on porches and skeletons in flowerbeds.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">One of them flew from Miami to Washington, for two nights, just to see me. Surprised me at a reunion dinner, so that when I realised she was there I squealed, and cried, hugged her hard. Spent the following day wandering the museums and monuments together, walking, talking. That same holiday, another took time off work to explore New York with me, her now home. Cooked me dinner with some of her friends in her Brooklyn apartment, invited me to her running club’s marathon watching party. Bundled me up into her life and city, so that I didn’t feel the absence of my usual holiday partner, or didn’t feel it so much.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"> </span> </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Another undertook a summer long tour with me of North London’s ice cream parlours. Icy sweetness as a respite from the pavements that throbbed with heat, the sticky London underground, my too-warm flat. Mango and durian sorbet in Kentish Town, cookies and cream from Marine Ices, cherry frozen yoghurt two steps from the traffic of the Finchley Road, tubs of blood orange sorbet from Loft Coffee eaten in the garden of the Camden Arts Centre.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Another introduced me to the mind-numbing but addictive diversion of <i>Love Island. </i>We pinged WhatsApps across London to each other commenting on the contestants' outfits and attitudes, as we simultaneously got our daily fix on those hot summer nights where I sat on the sofa eating only bowls of cereal for dinner because with the heat and the heartache I could manage nothing else. She provided me with advice that seemed wise beyond her 24 years, and which I repeated to myself all summer, a mantra: <i>It’s like Going On A Bear Hunt. You can’t go over it, you can’t go under it, you just have to go through it.</i></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiydKw3ixIEX2SkQilAki1R63_zpB4-ypnbLC41zSsbus5u9cYAGwgCaAejr4_rdg9dTU0Thlbd8YzmchZjApTNCP0lyWNidcIWwb7_Gp0KSQxKAqMwIevaOGLMZur5TuAicOG-TEQqlUnF/s1600/20190308_172604.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiydKw3ixIEX2SkQilAki1R63_zpB4-ypnbLC41zSsbus5u9cYAGwgCaAejr4_rdg9dTU0Thlbd8YzmchZjApTNCP0lyWNidcIWwb7_Gp0KSQxKAqMwIevaOGLMZur5TuAicOG-TEQqlUnF/s1600/20190308_172604.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They made me dinners and lunches and breakfasts. They sent me flowers and lent me books. Nora Ephron’s <i>Heartburn</i> which made me smile wryly on the Jubilee line, think about who I would throw key lime pie at, whether that would make me feel any better. Naomi Novik’s <i>Uprooted</i>, pressed into my hands with the comment: <i>Read this, it will transport you (and don’t worry if you drop it in the bath, it is my lending copy).</i></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They filled spots at gigs and comedy nights and theatre performances – the dozen events in the diary that we had signed up to together, which stretched out through the summer and into the autumn, starting with a Courtney Barnett gig at the Roundhouse in early June, ending with an October performance of Hamilton. Everyone said: <i>How lucky, at least you didn’t have children together, or jointly own property, or a own dog. </i>But a busy social calendar and a freezer full of leftovers in portions for two and a wine rack of wine purchased together on holiday is still a pair of lives fused together, which must be wrenched apart. And when the stepping stones of our joint social life petered out (and even before it did, in the gaps) they stepped into the void, populated a new social calendar, filled it with Estonian Bluegrass bands, picnics on Primrose Hill, Maggie Rogers at Koko, gigs in greenhouses, drinks in North London pubs, dinners in local Italians, trips to The Globe.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They swam with me. In the height of summer in the green of the Kenwood Ladies’ Pond, watching as baby moorhens ran across lily pads, or the blue of London Fields Lido. In the early days of winter and a very different looking Kenwood Ladies’ Pond, this one with cold black water, brown reeds, bare trees above. They ran with me, around the Olympic Park, along the canals, canoed with me, filling otherwise empty, stretching Sundays with water and sunlight and aching arms.</span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYFeSdVA4iexPosT7aE9sMB6B4nzPaO8FUqqLmLzc5R8xQzHjsOJ7-sn6FRx5dkSpU7j1qhOX3W_D-hg-G0RcXwi0zrgmBYgNkRnorDVERImeDPrCIP4EBU_5UzhSF8Jwd-nndORxmU4BQ/s1600/20190308_173146.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiYFeSdVA4iexPosT7aE9sMB6B4nzPaO8FUqqLmLzc5R8xQzHjsOJ7-sn6FRx5dkSpU7j1qhOX3W_D-hg-G0RcXwi0zrgmBYgNkRnorDVERImeDPrCIP4EBU_5UzhSF8Jwd-nndORxmU4BQ/s1600/20190308_173146.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">They came over for dinner, and helped with the food prep, stuck around to clear up afterwards. Made me realise that in my many years of hosting people, I had been doing it all wrong. I didn’t need to have an entire meal plus welcome cocktail ready for when the first guest arrived. I could ask for someone to bring dessert and they would, I could ask for a couple of people to come early to squeeze limes, and yet another to move the extra table from the kitchen to the living room, and they would do that too, willingly.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">They spoke soft words to me that I wanted to hear, tales of friends who had split and reunited, and hard words that I didn’t want to, but which were good for me anyway. They gave me advice by the bucketload, that was often contradictory, depending on who I was talking to, and that I didn’t always listen to, because I didn’t always agree with it, but which I valued anyway, because it came from a place of love. I learnt who to talk to on the days I was feeling resolute and Amazonian, and who to talk to on the days I felt lost and untethered. They also listened. Endlessly. And those that couldn't speak or listen in person </span><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">WhatsApped me from their scattered geographic locations – Abuja, Bogota, Baghdad, Islamabad, Miami, New York, Rome, Washington – checking in with me intermittently, taking late night calls from their different time zones.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">They helped me in all these ways and a myriad more, providing consolation and indignation and advice and distraction in equal measure. And like my family, their support was also bottomless, and unconditional, although it didn’t have to be. They filled that whole messy, grief filled summer and autumn with their presence, and in doing so turned it into not just a story of heartbreak and loss, but also a story of the power of friendship and non-romantic love. </span></span><span style="font-family: "arial" , sans-serif; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg71R0iI4NWjNo-Av6vpH1bPD-TJFSQ4SHjDfuhiToCSid4KOFAZQzT5-XYyAF0Di752AGLPBGoNa-fy5ln0PSPMyoohsqSirJtPE1ziX54QZPkQoVZf_QBPJ4wxTqvAbk_LRu_RxLIVUgd/s1600/20190308_173053.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg71R0iI4NWjNo-Av6vpH1bPD-TJFSQ4SHjDfuhiToCSid4KOFAZQzT5-XYyAF0Di752AGLPBGoNa-fy5ln0PSPMyoohsqSirJtPE1ziX54QZPkQoVZf_QBPJ4wxTqvAbk_LRu_RxLIVUgd/s1200/20190308_173053.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-30938322245477080272019-01-15T21:42:00.001+00:002019-01-15T21:58:26.121+00:00January So Far<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSS9XRGn4fA4EClYQ0b225_RqZSsGnMGMQ4whKCcow5_aaeHcIFrKtMX_mCMs-oBsn-MPu1ZZXmK4nCqwXDGMT4C_xppYRxnXm6ek_CMwNL2Q74SO7OCWY44dYkLKN1yit7_bUHoeEEgjZ/s1600/20190115_204023.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhSS9XRGn4fA4EClYQ0b225_RqZSsGnMGMQ4whKCcow5_aaeHcIFrKtMX_mCMs-oBsn-MPu1ZZXmK4nCqwXDGMT4C_xppYRxnXm6ek_CMwNL2Q74SO7OCWY44dYkLKN1yit7_bUHoeEEgjZ/s400/20190115_204023.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 10pt;">A bruise, from a </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 13.3333px;">New Year’s Day </span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 10pt;">fall at Winter Wonderland where I slip and crash down, hard, onto my right knee, my bad knee, almost cry out from the pain of it, but leap up, not wanting to make a scene, not wanting the fuss and kindness of strangers. T</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 13.3333px;">hroughout that first week of the new year i</span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 10pt;">t blossoms from pink-purple to blue-green to brown-yellow, tender to the touch.</span><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Early nights and early mornings. Stepping out onto the cold street before a 7 am spin class like stepping into a hot bath in reverse. The goosebumped shudder of the body, the smack of the cold. Leaving the sports centre, a weathered plastic bag, caught high in the branches overhead, long strands of shredded plastic moving in the wind like a stranded jellyfish.</span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Columbia Road. Banana bread and milky tea at Lily Vanilli. Talking about the year ahead with two of my dearest, quietly hopeful. A huge bunch of white narcissus, fatter than my arm, which scent the tube carriage all the way back, and then, split into smaller bunches, distributed in every room, the whole flat. </span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">A rooftop bar near Waterloo on a Friday night with four of my university friends, our faces softened under the coral glow of the overhead strip heaters. Talking and talking until we get kicked out at closing. How wise and kind and funny they have all turned out to be, although of course they were always the latter two, even when we were 19, doing tequila shots in fancy dress outfits, making faces at each other across a silent library. But I am struck by how wise they have all become, how they share that wisdom freely, making me feel better about all manner of things. </span><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">Struck too by the easy intimacy that comes with time and the gradual accumulation of shared history. </span><span style="font-size: 10pt;">That evening, not wanting to be anywhere else, not feeling the lack of anyone either.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">Rose Matafeo at Soho Theatre. Seen first in Edinburgh in August, where by the end there were tears of sadness and not just laughter, S squeezing my hand. <i>And if you are a heart on your sleeve Pisces, and you are feeling loss, it only means that once upon a time you gave your 100% to something. </i>Inaccurately remembered I'm sure, but that was the gist, the takeaway theme that stuck with this heart-on-sleeve Pisces.<i> </i>This time round though, only laughter, pure and from the deepest part of me. Again, that evening, wanting to be exactly there, nowhere else, with exactly those people. </span><span style="font-size: 12pt;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaPH9Q4MvuYg4Br_-oLgwMjSSSqgv5ZoPcfXer8FP5UNrssVskjyWW6S9z3aARgSO2rtnK0Sy7lLvMxdBwWrrHbec-zfB2pGQX2eGF6xue_S_hpwPftWl67h4CppokBVmLDnWdgsDd50Om/s1600/20190115_210828.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaPH9Q4MvuYg4Br_-oLgwMjSSSqgv5ZoPcfXer8FP5UNrssVskjyWW6S9z3aARgSO2rtnK0Sy7lLvMxdBwWrrHbec-zfB2pGQX2eGF6xue_S_hpwPftWl67h4CppokBVmLDnWdgsDd50Om/s400/20190115_210828.jpg" width="400" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 10pt;">More swimming. Swimming indoors, length after length under bright lights and red, white, blue bunting. The chlorine cling of it, for hours after. Swimming outdoors, even as the thermometer drops. 4.5 degrees, 4 degrees. <i>Shorten your swim</i> the chalkboard warns, and I do, but once I am dressed again, I wish I’d stayed in longer. On Sunday, a female runner asks as I am leaving <i>did you swim? How was it?</i> </span><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><i>Cold,</i></span><i style="font-size: 13.3333px;"> </i><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">I tell her,</span><i style="font-size: 10pt;"> 4 degrees, </i><span style="font-size: 10pt;">and she gasps, but says she is keen to try. We talk for a bit. I share my experience so far, give tentative tips. Afterwards, I wish I had given her my number, told her to message me if she wanted some company for her first time. Kick whatever it was that held me back</span><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">, me who is usually braver than most at reaching out to people in this vast, anonymous city. The worry that she would have thought me strange perhaps, that she would have listened to my small offer of friendship and politely, awkwardly, declined.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Saturating myself with cinema the way I always do at this time of year, when the awards season gives us such rich pickings. <i>The Favourite</i>, dark and wickedly funny, with a compelling soundtrack and sumptuous costumes. <i>Colette</i>, a perfectly lovely way to pass two hours on a grey Saturday afternoon, but which I didn't adore. <i>Roma,</i> which started slowly, built up beautifully and is lingering even now, two days on. The perspective provided by the suffering of others. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Reading, reading. Other women's words that drape themselves around me. <a href="https://guardianbookshop.com/hope-in-the-dark.html">Words about hope</a>, and how it is an active, striving thing. <a href="https://guardianbookshop.com/melmoth.html">Words that weave a tale</a> of a jackdaws and cobbled streets and a fearsome legend. <a href="https://guardianbookshop.com/turning-557168.html">Words that describe the restorative power of swimming</a> far more eloquently than I was able to, the lure of lakes, of cold water, of wild places.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: 11pt; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">And writing. My own words, that come more readily than they have done for some time. </span><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;"> Words that </span><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">slot themselves together in my head as I am descending the escalator to the Bakerloo line, or cycling across Hyde Park in the January darkness, words which beg to be typed up, written down. </span><i style="font-size: 13.3333px;">Writing can be the mental equivalent of hitting a punch bag - </i><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;">I read on the Instagram feed of <a href="https://www.instagram.com/notestostrangers/?hl=en">Notes to Strangers</a>. Bookmark it for later. Come back to it. And think, it feels like that, these days, yes.</span></span><br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 13.3333px;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYVlk0KAhKKpaeexbDyyqXJ432q-UJZTbhz6O6TZQChyphenhyphenmItNAh5r3r7WCmIQ_pfrA9vI6Uf5yHIHyqcHMlQEk5ePXv2uXlzszxAxwWeK30tcBMzAY4X4fztlil04vqR6WRNNzrrcdWxNus/s1600/20190115_211108.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" data-original-height="1600" data-original-width="1600" height="400" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYVlk0KAhKKpaeexbDyyqXJ432q-UJZTbhz6O6TZQChyphenhyphenmItNAh5r3r7WCmIQ_pfrA9vI6Uf5yHIHyqcHMlQEk5ePXv2uXlzszxAxwWeK30tcBMzAY4X4fztlil04vqR6WRNNzrrcdWxNus/s400/20190115_211108.jpg" width="400" /></a></span></span></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-21141392338619041462019-01-06T19:47:00.000+00:002019-01-06T19:47:10.415+00:00On Swimming<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjMvcOmXpe7m9s0nOqLqcpHLRJid_PntHld020UT31JFrdZdDh-7_QUsB6awWJ1AFRM7arGduHBCun36W3Jy0ZyHKoMBijZ4QdmXFjbQBpRwKDHaYq6Ce_6h6CB4pxC3Xxf8u5XEmAK5BUH/s1600/20190106_082057.jpg" /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">I learnt to swim in Brazil as a young child, in a pool I have only the haziest memories of. A flash of turquoise, pinky-yellow stone, a tanned instructor in tiny Speedos, eyes obscured behind reflective sunglasses, a poolside shrub with glossy green leaves and bright red berries. I may have imagined the shrub. I may have imagined it all, and these are not memories, but constructions, based on things told to me by my parents, again and again over the years, until they became fixed. At any rate, I learnt to swim, and when we moved to Australia I continued to swim, and twice in those overseas years I am told I nearly drowned.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit; text-align: center;">Back in the UK, swimming was weekly sessions at primary school, my class crocodiling in pairs down the road to the local leisure centre each Wednesday, swimming lengths and diving for rubber bricks, trying to master butterfly. Later, though still the primary school years, it was Thursday night swimming squad, talcum powder and the snap of rubber swimming caps, being shouted at from the side as we swam length after length, faster, faster.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">In secondary school, the regular swimming stopped. It was confined to holidays, the green pool of family friends in Provence, overlooked by an almond grove. Summer trips to the Suffolk coast, jumping the waves at Dunwich and Walberswick or, in North Norfolk, walking then wading for seemingly miles to reach anything like sufficiently deep water at Holkham. A hotel pool in Havana where over the course of a week I developed a crush on an American tourist purely on the basis of his smile and the hammer and sickle tattoo on his right shoulder. Austrian and French lakes, where I was squeamish about weeds that might grasp or fish that might skim a bare leg. Back then, I didn’t like wild, outdoor swimming, unless it was the sea.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4bv5jpjQQ7fdG4eXSnqnX4PgP5SHFz88ROXk0FsSJHeW54nl5sEBzJQpWR8CSVTDO29tVH2U2tIE6xUmaxWp3mHOYuBrDA7D6tQ0r4S15xAhPCD1B8etX7LiaOO2GAYB4FYHPCnpO7qrh/s1600/20190106_083251.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4bv5jpjQQ7fdG4eXSnqnX4PgP5SHFz88ROXk0FsSJHeW54nl5sEBzJQpWR8CSVTDO29tVH2U2tIE6xUmaxWp3mHOYuBrDA7D6tQ0r4S15xAhPCD1B8etX7LiaOO2GAYB4FYHPCnpO7qrh/s1600/20190106_083251.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Somewhere along the way, that changed. Maybe in Kinshasa, where at the weekend we would escape the city, take boats upstream, pass whole days on sandbanks in the middle of the wide, brown, fast-flowing Congo river. Sit in the slower moving shallows, beers in hand, as tiny fish nibbled our toes. The weekends at the Bombo Lemene nature reserve, where we would cross a bridge made from twisted vines, walk 500m upstream from the campsite, throw ourselves off a protruding tree trunk into the water then drift back downstream just like that Bare Necessities scene from The Jungle Book. The pool under the waterfall at Zongo which we would jump into from slippery rocks, rainbows arcing in the spray. Silly to be squeamish about European weeds and fish once you have swum in a place with Tigerfish and poisonous snakes, rocks that could crack open a skull miles from any decent hospital.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2O6cUevceupy2NGgMnTYvwZGRYNYdZTX1ESPHpuog6HmDBmqnZCU34X_zD3Ua5Ajeq5g5xOTXLBrAsNwobGQhF0UeFvbeAHKjfdtf92BrXfuTVUCsQcM98xX5S8m78jeYnN0YnBZTiYbk/s1600/IMG_20130310_210935.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi2O6cUevceupy2NGgMnTYvwZGRYNYdZTX1ESPHpuog6HmDBmqnZCU34X_zD3Ua5Ajeq5g5xOTXLBrAsNwobGQhF0UeFvbeAHKjfdtf92BrXfuTVUCsQcM98xX5S8m78jeYnN0YnBZTiYbk/s1600/IMG_20130310_210935.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Certainly since Kinshasa I have been able to embrace dips in the Serpentine Lido with its scattering of intimidating swans and Canada geese, and the Hampstead Ponds (with their far less intimidating ducks and moorhens). I have swum in a freshwater, but man-made, swimming pool filtered by reedbeds in the shadow of the King’s Cross gasholders. I have swum in Copenhagen’s wood-lined, net-bottomed Harbour Baths, and the turquoise lake at Annecy. I have shouted ‘stop the car’ from the passenger seat of a hire car on the Isle of Skye, scrambled down a steep hillside to a crescent of pebble beach, undressed and marched out over grey stones and tangled brown kelp to submerge myself in an icy sea loch. Although during that July of 2017, of course, my concept of icy was relative.</span></span><br />
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiscTy0KQ1I_O439DH55ju2zmDGzc68CHxTB_3WZxg80r3Y6HIFxviZlJnum_WDf8UaBhpWw8DNS-fTuZrnvY1IOEqPRWBM9A-dOucMX9_T6TOghsyg7NGIMdwoEUWoukFgGOlNF08Nfw8g/s1600/20190106_183435.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiscTy0KQ1I_O439DH55ju2zmDGzc68CHxTB_3WZxg80r3Y6HIFxviZlJnum_WDf8UaBhpWw8DNS-fTuZrnvY1IOEqPRWBM9A-dOucMX9_T6TOghsyg7NGIMdwoEUWoukFgGOlNF08Nfw8g/s1600/20190106_183435.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">March of last year. We go to Bath for the weekend, float lazily in a heated open air rooftop pool as the snow falls down around us. At the start of May, we take the sleeper to Penzance for a long weekend that feels like magic, the sun shines, the hedgerows are filled with golden gorse, we swim in tiny coves with yellow sand and clear blue waters, we wander the dark backstreets at night and talk of packing it all in and buying a house by the sea. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Three weeks later, my heart is unexpectedly, unceremoniously broken.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">I swim then in search of solace. That whole long, stifling summer, when the heat to me feels oppressive and infinite, and the pain feels equally so, swimming provides some small relief. I spend whole afternoons at the Kenwood Ladies’ Pond with whichever girlfriends I can gather, or sometimes alone. I doze in the sunshine, wake up, remember, peel myself from my towel to go throw myself in the cold green water to forget. I crave that moment of initial submersion, when the shock of the cold means I can’t think of anything else. I struggle through days at work then make my muscles burn pedaling my bike up Camden High Street and Kentish Town Road for evening swims. In August I go to Greece, kick about in an azure Aegean, contemplate Karen Blixen’s words: </span><i>the cure for anything is saltwater – sweat, tears or the salt sea</i>. Know this to be true, although a cure can be a long term process. When we go to Cromer in September I persuade S to swim in the sea with me. Still seeking that moment when everything but the feel of the cold water on your skin is wiped from your mind.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFwJfbkH6898KJu_AGo7DWH42q31DyG3owDoAyrqG0DuAOlr1r_cNjcM7jehgEIZwYZv-Gu8KAxqP9Ay2u8W7gR7cDbVP2NJ1YtcPyc7z_O_TJDont3ApfJH-cikYaoT9ahIOTE3yXMPnB/s1600/20190106_082137.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjFwJfbkH6898KJu_AGo7DWH42q31DyG3owDoAyrqG0DuAOlr1r_cNjcM7jehgEIZwYZv-Gu8KAxqP9Ay2u8W7gR7cDbVP2NJ1YtcPyc7z_O_TJDont3ApfJH-cikYaoT9ahIOTE3yXMPnB/s1600/20190106_082137.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;"><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">In October, again at the ponds, 13 degrees C, I realise I didn’t before understand the meaning of cold water. In early December, at Brockwell Lido, 8 degrees C, I realise again that I had no idea. But the sky and the bare trees and the joyous shouts of a birthday swim going on a few lanes over soothe me, and I swim ten lengths, until I have lost feeling in my fingers and toes. Afterwards, I take an ill-conceived hot shower, almost black out as I am </span><span style="color: #222222;">toweling</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"> myself dry. See a kaleidoscope of colours dance across my eyes. Have to sit in a toilet cubicle for ten minutes, head between legs before I can pull my clothes on and stagger out, white-faced and shaking, to the rest of the group. Another form of clearing the mind, but one I find I don’t much care for.</span></span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"> </span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">In the last days of December I return to the Ladies’ Pond, prepared. 5.5 degrees C, and again my concept of cold is </span><span style="color: #222222;">recalibrated</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">. But I am ready. I wear a bobble hat, and only swim one loop of the buoys. I towel dry and bundle back up again quickly in layer upon layer, saving the shower for home, drink from a thermos of hot tea, put on gloves and keep the hat, walk briskly uphill to meet a friend at Kenwood for hot chocolate, and warm myself up that way. And it is exhilarating.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0.0001pt;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="background-clip: initial; background-image: initial; background-origin: initial; background-position: initial; background-repeat: initial; background-size: initial;">I think if 2018 hadn't been the year it was, if something hadn't broken inside me, I wouldn't have been able to submerge myself in 5 degree water, or certainly wouldn't have been able to do so with such ease. I am not just talking about a broken heart, though having something you want to forget helps. I am also talking about the bit of me that lived a happy, comfortable life and, though I frequently acknowledged that happiness and comfort, naively assumed that it would most likely continue pottering along as such. That bit of me has also broken. Ariel Levy's idea that: <i>it has been made overwhelmingly clear to me now that anything you think is yours by right can vanish, and what you can do about that is nothing at all</i>. Expectations of the life you will lead can shatter on a random Tuesday afternoon, just as the lyrics of Baz Luhrmann’s Sunscreen warn us they might. I no longer blithely assume ease and comfort, either in my life or in swimming. And so, just as I swam through the summer seeking solace, I continue to swim through the winter. I don’t know if swimming is saving me. Some days I still feel a long way from being saved. But I think it has prevented me from drowning.</span> </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP314Wt7yBGUe7QBQcGxiQbIsFdPnREUjZuYNxGNt4H627kzHY7AZjyaKkpBHZ93SIQReGT89cinv6sNdL8vFX9DGltvoejHnvDbUHMy6ib_etq82XrmlPRLLGyiFP0ac9MdxLqr_ttHq7/s1600/20190106_184046.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP314Wt7yBGUe7QBQcGxiQbIsFdPnREUjZuYNxGNt4H627kzHY7AZjyaKkpBHZ93SIQReGT89cinv6sNdL8vFX9DGltvoejHnvDbUHMy6ib_etq82XrmlPRLLGyiFP0ac9MdxLqr_ttHq7/s1600/20190106_184046.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"></span></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-79608513134438535292017-07-03T18:08:00.000+01:002017-07-03T18:08:17.505+01:00Norfolk/Suffolk, beaches/bikes<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglb4lXCNhKb2KiJT_glrEcRQWXPOwaNNOoU1i8t6Rd47m0fGyE3jgsaJYN8zayUEdKLSAlGq5z9w48QLUk3Iw4yULz1B5EQyLwW8lURME1p8bZdtzQRYUcgO2y_7GurfYLPIIbFQUc6PSR/s1600/beach+1.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglb4lXCNhKb2KiJT_glrEcRQWXPOwaNNOoU1i8t6Rd47m0fGyE3jgsaJYN8zayUEdKLSAlGq5z9w48QLUk3Iw4yULz1B5EQyLwW8lURME1p8bZdtzQRYUcgO2y_7GurfYLPIIbFQUc6PSR/s1200/beach+1.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
E and I take our bikes on the train, after work. Cycle to my parents through darkened streets, there for the weekend. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
The weather is grumbling, changeable, warm air, but scudding clouds, passages of sunshine, and no more than the threat of rain. We barbecue in the garden, two nights in a row. A herbivore's barbecue, golden corn and scarlet peppers, asparagus from the garden, and the first of the courgettes. On Saturday, plump, home grown artichokes, eaten the French way, boiled, leaves dipped in lemon juice and melted butter. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
The garden, full to bursting with roses, clematis. A green-purple haze of lavender, artichokes, lupins in one of the vegetable patches. At the top of the garden, the raspberry and tayberry canes, dripping with red fruit. So many we can't eat them all. I layer them in mascarpone and scatter them with rose petals to make a <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/lifeandstyle/2005/jul/10/foodanddrink.features1">Nigel Slater recipe</a> from Tender II, steep them in Kilner jars with gin. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
We drive to the coast, the Suffolk coast, Walberswick, where we have been going since childhood. Families line the sea wall and estuary bridges with nets and lines of string, packets of bacon, each bucket beside them full of a seething mass of crabs, as we used to pass the time, years ago. Lunch in a pub garden, ominous skies above, local cider, and chips, salt and vinegar drenched. Finding a hollow in the dunes, settling there with books and blankets. The courageous among us braving the 'refreshing' (!) waters during a break in the clouds, jumping the waves, warming up after with a thermos of tea. Taste of salt on our skin for the rest of the afternoon. Dad, hidden behind the grasses, flying a kite. Sea holly, grey-blue-green and star like. Afterwards, a wander through the village, past the community noticeboard and tiny postbox, hollyhock filled front gardens, gooseberry and elderflower ice cream in hand, eaten from a tub with a plastic spoon.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Sunday. A 25 mile bike ride, along with hundreds of others. Bright yellow number cards, tied to handlebars. A mix of serious looking, Lycra clad participants (some cycling 50 miles, or 100), and those there for the fun of it, like us. Cycling down country lanes between bramble entwined hedgerows, crossing the odd A road. Enjoying the breeze, and even, oddly, the rare burst uphill (in a very flat East Anglia), legs burning, but feeling stronger and more capable than I had done this time last year, when I completed it on a rickety bike, before cycling to work and around London on a regular basis became the norm. The calm at the side of the field whilst one member of the group fixed a puncture, and I photographed poppies. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6yXEQX-Ophp9KqmfaPd4EY4ilmACHBB12BCvgihZuPQZu4ODt6W9LOPhHXPxgy3Ikc7zuHbHBYshFj4i9fTHsrqdHn2LqImRpv_qQkzq6aEhp7QLe7seVQni5192rOCfg3E35LL3Bfgxy/s1600/20170624_153749.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6yXEQX-Ophp9KqmfaPd4EY4ilmACHBB12BCvgihZuPQZu4ODt6W9LOPhHXPxgy3Ikc7zuHbHBYshFj4i9fTHsrqdHn2LqImRpv_qQkzq6aEhp7QLe7seVQni5192rOCfg3E35LL3Bfgxy/s1200/20170624_153749.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgTYgWzRs1EKs-ckiepWGeK0sZ7QsaQ_UeyK1_-c5CjVVrxvDGsrikw2IsTYnGrUN8KoijVUzWy98SkXr8MYl82hFFTYI0z6f9YUU7SMKbiI7XQlu-yrIRrlyBdGnbubW2MklZc-IcXPsL/s1600/20170624_144914.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjgTYgWzRs1EKs-ckiepWGeK0sZ7QsaQ_UeyK1_-c5CjVVrxvDGsrikw2IsTYnGrUN8KoijVUzWy98SkXr8MYl82hFFTYI0z6f9YUU7SMKbiI7XQlu-yrIRrlyBdGnbubW2MklZc-IcXPsL/s1200/20170624_144914.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0DJIZ7hVUBsAiqfr7TMgDwP3AvAXYyyXuKpv40HCwidWSj6mAulx2iBZVqOybk1Wc8Wr8nDrlFsxUis-dHptRQ5KqzwmZLfFf89xOi8YvsWRgNgNCN7YywirO6UKZVDL-BKp1JPezGxOJ/s1600/20170624_160202.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg0DJIZ7hVUBsAiqfr7TMgDwP3AvAXYyyXuKpv40HCwidWSj6mAulx2iBZVqOybk1Wc8Wr8nDrlFsxUis-dHptRQ5KqzwmZLfFf89xOi8YvsWRgNgNCN7YywirO6UKZVDL-BKp1JPezGxOJ/s1200/20170624_160202.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe99cPI2Eu_8JLTUWnDUEDOJSoq8OoblYRuvZmXxmvO0ljINnz-yV-O2sxLexIRMwGdcaKnggZmTW4XH6tOWiczQTcOsN8o870gTlZ3un3_BYm_sEfEj-e6DGFnYCOqo-PBXxGr23qREVo/s1600/20170624_154715.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhe99cPI2Eu_8JLTUWnDUEDOJSoq8OoblYRuvZmXxmvO0ljINnz-yV-O2sxLexIRMwGdcaKnggZmTW4XH6tOWiczQTcOsN8o870gTlZ3un3_BYm_sEfEj-e6DGFnYCOqo-PBXxGr23qREVo/s1200/20170624_154715.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiToSNYZyu6VcB7uON98CrzwOylQEp7jgxAub6gzkknvq0ayGuzOf6-iEciDRHY5kF0B5vzPFNFwYIJ-VRR98-F7oDi_cqegXc-cOpsX6EFLNVpkK4E-n6rS_kSwhXW-NaCdn_YdPcyqChu/s1600/20170624_160317.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiToSNYZyu6VcB7uON98CrzwOylQEp7jgxAub6gzkknvq0ayGuzOf6-iEciDRHY5kF0B5vzPFNFwYIJ-VRR98-F7oDi_cqegXc-cOpsX6EFLNVpkK4E-n6rS_kSwhXW-NaCdn_YdPcyqChu/s1200/20170624_160317.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT0D8byMHWnDHSCFtO_tgVAgflym4qkQ3NzmNrwY6NyMKIXlVinTFHLBYnK7eaViiBWYMqYotB0g1bAhM6uSzqfsQN4BZtGN8GS2xrwUNAN_gqc5_CHWtTm31Gf1itN2aqRanI00q5J_sr/s1600/20170623_203502.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhT0D8byMHWnDHSCFtO_tgVAgflym4qkQ3NzmNrwY6NyMKIXlVinTFHLBYnK7eaViiBWYMqYotB0g1bAhM6uSzqfsQN4BZtGN8GS2xrwUNAN_gqc5_CHWtTm31Gf1itN2aqRanI00q5J_sr/s1200/20170623_203502.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWe91N1U4ld2aaxHEshgO8S4X9swDT8BoKCe3DM1EkgRRBVWxjulewgetBGHYi2wKdMTYk66odzSCHLt5eK7FtUDSkS6mbryyRyYxxV_LI7qYjlsE_LGfCLY7KWt3juMoVWBnGBHRu2Wfs/s1600/20170623_185239.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiWe91N1U4ld2aaxHEshgO8S4X9swDT8BoKCe3DM1EkgRRBVWxjulewgetBGHYi2wKdMTYk66odzSCHLt5eK7FtUDSkS6mbryyRyYxxV_LI7qYjlsE_LGfCLY7KWt3juMoVWBnGBHRu2Wfs/s1200/20170623_185239.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_3OkYO1s4uWUEEQmMrw51a2-Xf42E7uofxX5h_abcxftGWW4B878-nIwDP8IOnYSnHoimKql4PJfCPnpWw8NIKqr1oa3E5kOU6mbFY3Fl6plINv6_TH8ivrpywcY1PPPorVMDbWMR2Hka/s1600/20170625_114416.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_3OkYO1s4uWUEEQmMrw51a2-Xf42E7uofxX5h_abcxftGWW4B878-nIwDP8IOnYSnHoimKql4PJfCPnpWw8NIKqr1oa3E5kOU6mbFY3Fl6plINv6_TH8ivrpywcY1PPPorVMDbWMR2Hka/s1200/20170625_114416.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKQv5btKECaM4BADPuEIjfr5s1p029CawJ3DFEaINyIhjurwhCSfL0VEdaPPFZZr26ogPVi1R4NT-bBMCOEmJIYVcVCZwm1rAiEwCMryNOZRfJjuVGer7SHLA6ZoMdapwqXDOK5_whZZyV/s1600/20170625_102931.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKQv5btKECaM4BADPuEIjfr5s1p029CawJ3DFEaINyIhjurwhCSfL0VEdaPPFZZr26ogPVi1R4NT-bBMCOEmJIYVcVCZwm1rAiEwCMryNOZRfJjuVGer7SHLA6ZoMdapwqXDOK5_whZZyV/s1200/20170625_102931.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMvL4cF1i5a08QjI1LKB5eiLK0KgwvulePC0W9laIeVhyIhEQRYFADgMACUNEdcVhY8lCAXmRI0Kcud3MmkVXKeA8ut2Gy8SQ9VDqf24u8QktAkqT1gr9zhI2aYD_ayQU2FRpMQlaoqkKS/s1600/20170625_114140.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgMvL4cF1i5a08QjI1LKB5eiLK0KgwvulePC0W9laIeVhyIhEQRYFADgMACUNEdcVhY8lCAXmRI0Kcud3MmkVXKeA8ut2Gy8SQ9VDqf24u8QktAkqT1gr9zhI2aYD_ayQU2FRpMQlaoqkKS/s1200/20170625_114140.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv32_qwWqCgX24CkglzqSD_ZfeDhvbTNhhiQqQA-EvQlGu7Ldc9PohyphenhyphenJTy7bqrd7lMBctXJ6xDD8xsWYq-9a7-TSaf6tgwtS_9ULKuS_lb2o0dRMskU5uqRXYPnP1aCrl39eZbEXUzXHvt/s1600/20170625_135407.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv32_qwWqCgX24CkglzqSD_ZfeDhvbTNhhiQqQA-EvQlGu7Ldc9PohyphenhyphenJTy7bqrd7lMBctXJ6xDD8xsWYq-9a7-TSaf6tgwtS_9ULKuS_lb2o0dRMskU5uqRXYPnP1aCrl39eZbEXUzXHvt/s1200/20170625_135407.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxuByuDwqyfFYdB1UZP3jooFq6s64-0Ytqd6ZACTHNksH0jQDE0MQZKOfkRiJBOv9RyGMBYD_KkyOr3rJ1jRq0t6qeXAO_cN6NXEtUE1WauNk4_TWuLtCDizmAP-50aiDloFGyqMidOtNw/s1600/20170625_152944.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhxuByuDwqyfFYdB1UZP3jooFq6s64-0Ytqd6ZACTHNksH0jQDE0MQZKOfkRiJBOv9RyGMBYD_KkyOr3rJ1jRq0t6qeXAO_cN6NXEtUE1WauNk4_TWuLtCDizmAP-50aiDloFGyqMidOtNw/s1200/20170625_152944.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnd-WRKGhwugXXyH6Z_KeBgQuJwm8mhL0HAMj2oB6E-sgn6wVdnj-aR2pIFhc7nDZSMuJAoJAwp8kq75Awft1Ymq-AWG0hsV9B61tlP6qMcEV4AghDACD0HlrFf1moywe1LxyhI4gJV9g2/s1600/20170625_152130.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgnd-WRKGhwugXXyH6Z_KeBgQuJwm8mhL0HAMj2oB6E-sgn6wVdnj-aR2pIFhc7nDZSMuJAoJAwp8kq75Awft1Ymq-AWG0hsV9B61tlP6qMcEV4AghDACD0HlrFf1moywe1LxyhI4gJV9g2/s1200/20170625_152130.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-52084140708070989992017-06-23T17:52:00.001+01:002017-06-23T17:52:21.681+01:00Conversations with a self<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4zKYXSCCDDPnExbmxc6un33SoAI0jA2IlcaQOqHtY010raCjBvjqSlMaKRIzc0gvO0s09mpdBVTqUz49TN17TkgYj45zA8oO-ytpGU8dT3YKCci2fzjk_-ky1CLBnCWAu4hLBtpqLds9m/s1600/Primrose+Hill.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" data-original-height="1200" data-original-width="1600" height="480" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh4zKYXSCCDDPnExbmxc6un33SoAI0jA2IlcaQOqHtY010raCjBvjqSlMaKRIzc0gvO0s09mpdBVTqUz49TN17TkgYj45zA8oO-ytpGU8dT3YKCci2fzjk_-ky1CLBnCWAu4hLBtpqLds9m/s640/Primrose+Hill.jpg" width="640" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
I want to write something.<br />
<br />
<i>But you haven't written in so long. </i><br />
<br />
Better now than never.<br />
<br />
<i>Well it better be good then. A grand return. Sweeping and majestic, capturing all that has happened since you last wrote.</i><br />
<br />
I'm not sure I can manage that.<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You'll have to, it's not worth it otherwise.</i><br />
<br />
I can't capture it all. The vastness of the changes. The votes and the outcomes, the subsequent actions taken (and not taken), the way the world seems to have swallowed a whole packet of crazy and be spewing it up again, relentlessly, carelessly. I can't even capture all of the micro, the year plus of being back in London, the long hours spent in a new job, the seemingly fleeting but joy-packed evenings and weekends rediscovering the city, and further afield, E at my side (or, more accurately, long legged as he is, always a few paces ahead).<br />
<br />
Maybe I can just write the things that I know to be true.<br />
<br />
That the outcome of the vote a year ago today still breaks my heart, though the rawness has lessened, as these things do.<br />
<br />
That I feel like now more than ever I am struggling to make sense of the world, and my place in it.<br />
<br />
That simultaneously, I am happier than I have ever been. Living under the same roof as E, building a home together. A home where our bikes rest tail to tail in the hallway each night, where taking the recycling out is a shared duty, where we try (and sometimes fail) to keep the basil plants on the kitchen windowsill green and perky. Being back in London, my city, my love. Closer to friends, to family, no longer the twice yearly frantic whirl of social calls, squeezing dear ones in for a snatched coffee and pleasantries. No longer being there just for the big ticket events of weddings, and Christmas, but also now for the little ones, the midweek suppers, the impromptu picnics in the park, the things that weave a friendship together, tighter.<br />
<br />
That two nights ago we had an impromptu picnic in the park, celebrated the summer solstice on Primrose Hill. Took tablecloths to sit on and <a href="http://www.theboywhobakes.co.uk/recipes/2017/2/23/rhubarb-gin">rhubarb gin</a> to drink, a bag of ice and a mishmash of friends collected from university, work, Congo. Made a picnic of olives and Kettle Chips, pizzas collected from the place down the road, fat, glossy Kentish cherries for after. Watched as the sun set and the city lights came on. Grieved for this city, and all that it has been battered with these last few months, loved it unconditionally.<br />
<br />
* * * *<br />
<br />
A few other things:<br />
<br />
- <a href="https://www.instagram.com/p/BVZ7gNllmiT/?taken-by=yrsadaleyward&hl=en">Don't be fooled</a>.<br />
<br />
- Poignant photo essay <a href="https://www.theguardian.com/artanddesign/2017/jun/22/a-hot-summer-night-in-london-photo-essay">here</a>. (<i style="font-size: small;">"<span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Guardian Text Egyptian Web", Georgia, serif; font-variant-ligatures: common-ligatures;">Wednesday brought both the longest day of the year and the hottest June weather in four decades, a combination that seemed to intensify the strangeness of these times - when the hours feel precarious, and every morning brings fresh and unfathomable news...</span><span style="background-color: white; font-family: "Guardian Text Egyptian Web", Georgia, serif; font-variant-ligatures: common-ligatures;">")</span></i><br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />
<br />Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-1510588154650617342016-02-20T16:17:00.001+00:002016-02-20T16:17:28.675+00:00On returning<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"></span><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuqjIz2gPvL4nJ5XgerFCTpypcW2J0tPgnF-uccesFj4VO-KC9UXp6dRxZFdwPLcN2IxbazT5yU8MLL38uUXPlVNItzBrd8BFzHnDlSHRPhgXjfuMOPUJrOu7NLb0pqpbdQQPQNgugMl13/s1600/trafalgar.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="180" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhuqjIz2gPvL4nJ5XgerFCTpypcW2J0tPgnF-uccesFj4VO-KC9UXp6dRxZFdwPLcN2IxbazT5yU8MLL38uUXPlVNItzBrd8BFzHnDlSHRPhgXjfuMOPUJrOu7NLb0pqpbdQQPQNgugMl13/s1200/trafalgar.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<i style="color: #222222; font-family: Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></i>
<i style="color: #222222;"></i>
<i style="color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">It's only been a week but already...</span></i><br />
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I was reminded of those words when <a href="http://www.teacupscupcakes.blogspot.co.uk/2013/02/arrival.html" style="color: #1155cc;" target="_blank">I'd been in Kinshasa a week</a>, way back in February 2013, and here they are again, with me on the flipside. </span><br />
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">To land, smack bang in the middle of a freezing February, has been the strangest thing. Blue skies and frost, or grey skies and drizzle, but always the frigid air, the dry skin, the inability to get warm, despite the heating and the hotwater bottles, the layers of clothing. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">There have been moments wondering whether perhaps Kinshasa was just some pineapple-scented, DEET-misted dream. And then the thought comes that maybe this, now, is the dream, visions of a life I once had but no longer, everything the same, almost, and yet...different. Familiar faces that tap me on the shoulder in the canteen, or pass me near the lifts, exclaim at me being here, my hair longer, swaddled in winter coat and scarves, plural. A new office building since I left, so that despite those familiar faces, it is as though I am the new girl at school again, not knowing how the printers work, or where the toilets are, or in which bin to deposit my banana skin. There are former Kinshasa colleagues too, who preceded me in the return to London, and I bump into them at the tea point, or coming out of meeting rooms, and I start at how, Wizard-of-Oz-like, these known faces are transplanted to a different world. </span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">I wander the supermarkets in a daze, marveling at the abundance of fresh green vegetables, the strawberries in February, the tiny cartons of chocolate coconut mylk. Mylk doesn't exist where I am from. At lunchtime it is worse, do I have the vegetarian sushi, the quinoa + feta + edamame salad, the roasted tomato soup? Tottenham Court Road Station is gleaming and new and I do not recognise it. There is wifi on tube platforms, and it seems they have put the trailers back to after the adverts again at the cinema. I can no longer remember which stations are on which branch of the Northern Line, and the double decker buses are entirely different creatures than their predecessors, sleeker, more shiny. </span></div>
</div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">This dream, it isn't unpleasant. To much choice, perhaps, not enough time in people's diaries, yes, household-admin heavy at the start, definitely, as I re-navigate utility bills and internet providers, where to put the dishwasher salt in the machine. But there are bookshops in this dream, and purple-sprouting broccoli, and I can walk and walk wherever I want to go. Were it not for the fact that I would, just for a moment, like to wake up in my southern-hemisphere room, air-con thrumming in the background, mosquito net draped around, to give E, warm and sleepy beside me, a kiss, I would be very happy to stay here indeed. </span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">For now, I am here, and he is there, and, just as I <a href="http://teacupscupcakes.blogspot.co.uk/2013/04/yes.html" style="color: #1155cc;">threw myself into Kinshasa life</a>, I am throwing myself back into London. There has been cinema and Columbia Road flower market, a pop-up ceramic museum and <a href="http://www.drinkshopdo.com/">Drink Shop Do</a> cups of tea, dosas at my <a href="http://www.diwanabph.com/">favourite South Indian</a>, <a href="http://www.hampsteadtheatre.com/whats-on/2016/the-meeting/">an excellent play</a>. I have re-paid my subs to the <a href="https://shoreditchsisterswi.com/">Shoreditch Sisters</a>, my beloved WI of old. I've joined a book group and <a href="http://www.conversationpieces.co.uk/blook-club/">Blook Club</a> (which might, I hear you say, be too much on the reading front - but with all the tube travel instead of the Kinshasa car I have read a book already this week, so I am definitely up for the challenge). Next week there is <a href="http://www.museumoflondon.org.uk/london-wall/whats-on/adult-events/tattoo-london-event/">late night at the Museum of London tattoo exhibition</a>, <a href="http://www.hamletpeckham.com/">Hamlet in Peckham</a>, a <a href="http://www.vaultfestival.com/event/eggs/2016-02-24/">play about fertility</a> performed in the Waterloo railway arches (and an <a href="http://www.vaultfestival.com/lates/">alternative Ceilidh</a> there later that week too), and <a href="http://www.odettetoilette.com/events/the-imbibliotheque/">a night of perfume and alcohol</a> as represented in modernist literature. </span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Hello London, I've missed you. </span></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: "georgia" , "times new roman" , serif;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-25143642186620844712015-04-11T12:37:00.000+01:002015-04-11T12:37:00.314+01:00Oh hai there<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie7JUzUpqv96kxl1WLlo0ug2vaXuF5ErOJGrwWhhqcTvmmyFIIAsnlT3HzDdqOC9jYr1OpWoNiFC4HDnMalaIWrWT-kEM9KN_2PF1ln18wr4KGQKLK3vILcTVPift-ZHsQxWqcj4PFdEBm/s1600/IMG_20150408_213205.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEie7JUzUpqv96kxl1WLlo0ug2vaXuF5ErOJGrwWhhqcTvmmyFIIAsnlT3HzDdqOC9jYr1OpWoNiFC4HDnMalaIWrWT-kEM9KN_2PF1ln18wr4KGQKLK3vILcTVPift-ZHsQxWqcj4PFdEBm/s1600/IMG_20150408_213205.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">I’m still here. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">It has been months since I have written I know, but here I am. Life has continued. A cool and overcast dry season followed by a rainy season of hot, sticky, days and only marginally cooler nights. A tapestry of BBQs and pool parties, mosquito bites and new scratches on the car, unwanted work deadlines and welcome holidays. Dear friends have left, and new additions to Kinshasa arrived in the continual ebb and flow of ex pat life here. Rainbow chard and basil have thrived on the balcony, the tomato plants by contrast have caught some sort of leaf disease and withered and died. My passion fruit vine has had its first season fruiting. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">What else to say? That I have been here over two years now. That in the last few months of 2013, over a year ago now, the 7 year relationship with M ended. Distance and difference and time zones. That I didn’t write about it then, because, how to?</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">That 2014 saw the start of a new relationship, begun under Kinshasa skies, on river trips on the vast Congo, a Bombo Lemene camping weekend, flickering firelight and plunging into cold fast flowing water, begun from a shared loved of pineapple, a shared sense of awe and wonder when stood in front of the Zongo waterfall, spray drenched.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">That 2014 was the year of the trip to India for V and A's wedding, and two trips to South Africa. An early summer return to the UK for a wedding, and a Christmas one. That it was the year I first went to the East of DRC, to Bukavu and Goma. That my sister came to stay, and it was the very best thing having her here, showing her my life rather than just telling her about it. That in 2015 so far I have been to Mbandaka in Equateur Province and, just this last weekend, driven through Bas Congo to the DRC coast, magnificent, and more beautiful than expected.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;">I have photos a plenty, and words too, those these latter still flying piecemeal round my head. So I will try to get them down, fill the gaps. </span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhY-zmB3HrmM1BjRDXwFwVCwanhoQJnZgIwgFYx2SDKGcth7CnATgfFL_Xf488Pb3OMKH8RKHREB4P14row5NxdOsiqsX6YzcRWvZ5dn8dNfRFI0X-AW4wIi_p8OTIUJVTbzKLrakKOGKdx/s1600/IMG_20150320_154234.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-size: medium; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhY-zmB3HrmM1BjRDXwFwVCwanhoQJnZgIwgFYx2SDKGcth7CnATgfFL_Xf488Pb3OMKH8RKHREB4P14row5NxdOsiqsX6YzcRWvZ5dn8dNfRFI0X-AW4wIi_p8OTIUJVTbzKLrakKOGKdx/s1600/IMG_20150320_154234.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-AgMLdcYNLOMkiJ4K_ntk9hd68W3Kywv6yq0sI0IJ96nykBxRCTBRU1EDaBh6zk5j_wXDjloRTkFI9OcgbTRBvPXejWYyilVrc2GHt7bAzPcI_5z_nj4ZRnzqUX0PSG0hB5rXTZ0OFpwB/s1600/IMG_20141015_180621.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg-AgMLdcYNLOMkiJ4K_ntk9hd68W3Kywv6yq0sI0IJ96nykBxRCTBRU1EDaBh6zk5j_wXDjloRTkFI9OcgbTRBvPXejWYyilVrc2GHt7bAzPcI_5z_nj4ZRnzqUX0PSG0hB5rXTZ0OFpwB/s1600/IMG_20141015_180621.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrm_-JynzlokV-c0jCagNKt_EBt0PseM1dS-xfmawjYBS1zm0ccUtY85JEnsO1_muBJoB7ukNbhwsKO1Kw5-VzziJw3-LPkOl-lYGdJDU39DI8H9BulCkxy81hGF4gWiYirtV6ydDN6l5w/s1600/IMG_20150219_223000.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgrm_-JynzlokV-c0jCagNKt_EBt0PseM1dS-xfmawjYBS1zm0ccUtY85JEnsO1_muBJoB7ukNbhwsKO1Kw5-VzziJw3-LPkOl-lYGdJDU39DI8H9BulCkxy81hGF4gWiYirtV6ydDN6l5w/s1600/IMG_20150219_223000.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; font-size: small; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com5tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-68689719500545302372014-04-16T22:02:00.000+01:002014-04-16T22:02:31.984+01:00The Strangest Circumstances<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzHImAvleKenv1Slrfj67C7Nww9WQEO06ESP7FkkDRzvNcNH3rFdwLolP1nacjJ2Km3Ewwagl3I84bW1gYuiFePvWFOt9oW9DbbEjxfAVL0XcWTwMdYB8nQdM-3MZL6Gd31YN5qBE1CPk1/s1600/IMG_20140326_194710.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgzHImAvleKenv1Slrfj67C7Nww9WQEO06ESP7FkkDRzvNcNH3rFdwLolP1nacjJ2Km3Ewwagl3I84bW1gYuiFePvWFOt9oW9DbbEjxfAVL0XcWTwMdYB8nQdM-3MZL6Gd31YN5qBE1CPk1/s1600/IMG_20140326_194710.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 10pt;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 10pt;">In January, I stumbled upon this quote*:</span></span><span style="font-family: inherit; font-size: 10pt;"> </span></div>
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<i><span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">"Sometimes you meet someone, and it’s so clear that the two of you on some level belong together. As lovers, or as friends, or as family, or as something entirely different, you just work, whether you understand one another, or you’re in love, or you’re partners in crime. You meet these people throughout your life, out of nowhere, under the strangest circumstances, and they help you feel alive. I don’t know if that makes me believe in coincidence, or fate, or sheer blind luck, but it definitely makes me believe in something."<u></u><u></u></span></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<br /></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-size: 13px;">It resonated, because I have felt this with so many of the people here. </span>That we <i>get </i>each other, that we are on the same wavelength.</span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">People who will, on an otherwise unremarkable Tuesday, at 10pm, say yes to a game of pool and drive with you to the other end of town, for whiskey sodas and 80s music, the bright green of the pool table, the crack and scatter of balls. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who will make papier mache pig pinatas with you, whilst watching Mad Men. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who share the belief that there are few things in life that aren't improved by the addition of pineapple. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who on the day that the office air-con breaks down, and there is no running water, will jump in the car with you at lunchtime to go eat salted caramel ice cream, blackcurrant sorbet. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who will mirror dance in the reflection of the sliding doors, to Shakira, full blast, hair swinging, hips shaking. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">People for whom Graceland is also </span><i style="font-family: inherit;">the </i><span style="font-family: inherit;">album to be driving down African roads listening too. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who also get excited by the blue and orange lizards that do press-ups in the car park, by 3D Lion King, by the way the lightning zig-zags violently across the sky. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who will ask their families for inflatable pool animals for Christmas so we can have an entire menagerie on river trips. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who will go on the swings with you, gladly, and not think you are strange for asking, not think it is strange to still love the feeling of kicking higher and higher into the air, despite no longer being seven. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">Who will dance like crazy things, until 4 in the morning, but equally make you chocolate brownies and do a puzzle with you on your darn-it-fell-on-a-Sunday birthday, whilst drinking copious amounts of tea. </span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Sometimes this amazes me. That it takes going halfway round the world to find these people. That when you share stories, of London, of your life back then, you realise you were all existing in the same spaces, without knowing it. Orbiting, circling, but never coming into contact, until now, here, in this place of hot heat, and violent rainstorms. That E and I both think longingly sometimes of Dotori in Finsbury Park, specifically, that umami-sweet-salt salad dressing. That M and I can recall exactly the cold, fresh hit of the Hampstead Ponds. That E and R lived for a time a stone’s throw from where I grew up, Chalk Farm, and remember ice cream from Marine Ices, walking with a cone to the top of Primrose Hill, sweetness melting onto your fingers. The others too, who I knew in London, but didn't really know fully, properly, until we all found ourselves here. <u></u></span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">That it wasn't whilst browsing the postcards in the Tate Modern gift shop, or whilst topping up drinks in plastic cups at a mutual friend's house party that I met these people.</span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Rather that it was only here, in this bonkers, brilliant, often frustrating, but never-a-dull-moment place that we have all come together, found each other. Friends, yes. But also a family, of sorts. </span></span><br />
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKGkVPWN96MD01KLcH_hkvI3tzPLLJv-LTPdpO53nxHraDdI_6m1pHwA3a6GBdqa6ZSAZj31d9u6wwdvHhExcSq03SuECTfopllTZZk5ciJJwICE8DSU4Cp-DzYLPWk1vho6lSYMmxPYME/s1600/IMG_20140416_214002.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-size: medium; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiKGkVPWN96MD01KLcH_hkvI3tzPLLJv-LTPdpO53nxHraDdI_6m1pHwA3a6GBdqa6ZSAZj31d9u6wwdvHhExcSq03SuECTfopllTZZk5ciJJwICE8DSU4Cp-DzYLPWk1vho6lSYMmxPYME/s1600/IMG_20140416_214002.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6Yrc1R8h5V5eICqaUK6a_LUBiT0NP_4avBjyNWZQylTWCM4S8CgCi7b2wID5hJiw7SZ0gRST39v6Tf9kjYldxQKqHFfZ4kYwa9wef3mWaidsuG58pYUSP-D1NeEineL7EVR3HO0PD1DcJ/s1600/IMG_20140302_220312.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-size: medium; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi6Yrc1R8h5V5eICqaUK6a_LUBiT0NP_4avBjyNWZQylTWCM4S8CgCi7b2wID5hJiw7SZ0gRST39v6Tf9kjYldxQKqHFfZ4kYwa9wef3mWaidsuG58pYUSP-D1NeEineL7EVR3HO0PD1DcJ/s1600/IMG_20140302_220312.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-size: 10pt;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">*On Pinterest, so I don't know where it came from I'm afraid</span></span></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-69862449381965121932014-03-11T22:35:00.001+00:002014-03-11T22:35:17.153+00:00One year<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsWZUzFEdeFsgtrRAU-WhkGGPXWD9Jed-1yc-Pu4MoK5PeRs8WvSm9zxt9-He0c00W2i-MF1VXaIrmm9A_trhhQPswzuh9B0SQoQr0x9cRO9QBzfP82X4POmiKjfkJnO50DmE_vRYssTJ0/s1600/IMG_20131007_204811.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjsWZUzFEdeFsgtrRAU-WhkGGPXWD9Jed-1yc-Pu4MoK5PeRs8WvSm9zxt9-He0c00W2i-MF1VXaIrmm9A_trhhQPswzuh9B0SQoQr0x9cRO9QBzfP82X4POmiKjfkJnO50DmE_vRYssTJ0/s1600/IMG_20131007_204811.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">A year here. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">Over a year. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">I arrived 16th February 2013, and now it is March, 2014. </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">Everyone says this, so to say it again is a cliche, but I don't know where the time has gone. </span><br />
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br />How things become normal. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
</div>
<br />
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">That here, Orion lies on his side, as though resting in the hot night air. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">That milk is either UHT or powdered. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">That Larium and radio check Wednesdays, and femme-de-menage Tuesdays, Thursdays, have become the routine, along with locking your car doors automatically on entry and visiting three different supermarkets just to get the ingredients for a G&T. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">That fruit is orange or yellow or white. Papaya, mango, passion fruit, banana, pineapple, star fruit, mangosteen, lychee. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">That I don't know what films are out in the cinema, or when the next season of Homeland will start. That I get most of my popular culture updates through a </span>Whatsapp group with my <span style="font-family: inherit;">university friends. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">That looking out of the office window I can sometimes see multi-coloured lizards doing press-ups on tree branches, red yellow orange blue, the bright, garish colours of a child's paintbox. That occasionally there is a g</span><span style="font-family: inherit;">ecko in my fruit bowl, wide eyed among the wrinkly skinned passion fruit. </span><span style="font-family: inherit;">That the heat becomes welcome, so that the entire time I was in England over Christmas I thought about the feel of the sun on my skin, and missed it, terribly. That I can tell now when a storm is coming, when the air presses down around you, to the point that the only possible release can be rain. </span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">It has been a crazy, tumble, helter-skelter of a year, full of music and dancing, of meeting new people and experiencing new things. Full of sunshine and pineapples and brightly coloured fabric and swimming in rivers and learning the French subjunctive. And without wanting to get all sentimental on you, or too rose tinted, because honestly the itch-like-hell mosquito bites will never, ever be a good thing, and the </span><span style="color: #222222;">bonkers</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"> road traffic, whilst amusing for the Instagram photos, is more than a little stressful in reality, all in all it has been really rather wonderful. </span><br />
<div style="color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhagpewUw50mW_kEFZQg_iqR20Ull-JQrIvTSsW2fr2sGFAb7_BbuEqK9AkXOpKDfT2q6V8zsDRUMQs4PagDDpezOk3JsDb_TYOEfV22MNBpSqqAo19mgWQvBwDkuUcXa0ACcMZcKNfF7mQ/s1600/IMG_20131012_124346.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhagpewUw50mW_kEFZQg_iqR20Ull-JQrIvTSsW2fr2sGFAb7_BbuEqK9AkXOpKDfT2q6V8zsDRUMQs4PagDDpezOk3JsDb_TYOEfV22MNBpSqqAo19mgWQvBwDkuUcXa0ACcMZcKNfF7mQ/s1600/IMG_20131012_124346.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiAMuqs4tKBjhir7L4dHYO6T9wGAnHYtPQe1f6k9sXcApiZVDf0pyxSJu-95tRjKWMgJw39339XEUejqVsjoXpRoc2Qi5ms8iVQAupqfno_220bLab8HO8r_2wVipVOl2rrGe4WyXGQ0Nl/s1600/IMG_20131124_181900.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhiAMuqs4tKBjhir7L4dHYO6T9wGAnHYtPQe1f6k9sXcApiZVDf0pyxSJu-95tRjKWMgJw39339XEUejqVsjoXpRoc2Qi5ms8iVQAupqfno_220bLab8HO8r_2wVipVOl2rrGe4WyXGQ0Nl/s1600/IMG_20131124_181900.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkH5tKAcZCcBoxEmI4bEVNKUry8bfcx8Pd9eWIM6IomGVoTlR19nJ4zefBelbZSTXQjG6pJ4zMzUUDYJVWFTW0IwblG2WZCiwVSUeb5kbVxlmtpDuHebTRSeHkK9i5ZTIy23BhoWRNDWv0/s1600/IMG_20131006_220912.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjkH5tKAcZCcBoxEmI4bEVNKUry8bfcx8Pd9eWIM6IomGVoTlR19nJ4zefBelbZSTXQjG6pJ4zMzUUDYJVWFTW0IwblG2WZCiwVSUeb5kbVxlmtpDuHebTRSeHkK9i5ZTIy23BhoWRNDWv0/s1600/IMG_20131006_220912.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIdCK6SnmwsVI-HelMAX31ksB0HgVZVun44kpkqOG16EyDyXz48xJN9jXlG89WneI9DZi-whj1Xmn8cXnjSf-gS2DkbUDOBjGDdXuW9K80N8zEKpGLRvqSnAmKpksL2xwiy5jRnUAJzqQB/s1600/IMG_20130819_172908.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIdCK6SnmwsVI-HelMAX31ksB0HgVZVun44kpkqOG16EyDyXz48xJN9jXlG89WneI9DZi-whj1Xmn8cXnjSf-gS2DkbUDOBjGDdXuW9K80N8zEKpGLRvqSnAmKpksL2xwiy5jRnUAJzqQB/s1600/IMG_20130819_172908.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjk6ZWwiCLU6RIhClDhYaceTlgnEqfZUrxTQd9WUaIP83tMAiHscWj_sZqdLd0dkPWKYN1jmMOcFLUu0aAnVLMVat64dXzX8G6FTsdJtWOdtayZcwqvpCWBBOmW-X_f_9a37t_3Jo67kpHy/s1600/IMG_20131019_205741.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="font-size: small; margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjk6ZWwiCLU6RIhClDhYaceTlgnEqfZUrxTQd9WUaIP83tMAiHscWj_sZqdLd0dkPWKYN1jmMOcFLUu0aAnVLMVat64dXzX8G6FTsdJtWOdtayZcwqvpCWBBOmW-X_f_9a37t_3Jo67kpHy/s1600/IMG_20131019_205741.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="color: #222222; font-size: small;">
<br /></div>
<!-- Blogger automated replacement: "https://images-blogger-opensocial.googleusercontent.com/gadgets/proxy?url=http%3A%2F%2F3.bp.blogspot.com%2F-l6yOjy0UsX0%2FUx-IShIVnqI%2FAAAAAAAAFks%2FQSxIiLKy5xw%2Fs1600%2FIMG_20130819_172908.jpg&container=blogger&gadget=a&rewriteMime=image%2F*" with "https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIdCK6SnmwsVI-HelMAX31ksB0HgVZVun44kpkqOG16EyDyXz48xJN9jXlG89WneI9DZi-whj1Xmn8cXnjSf-gS2DkbUDOBjGDdXuW9K80N8zEKpGLRvqSnAmKpksL2xwiy5jRnUAJzqQB/s1600/IMG_20130819_172908.jpg" -->Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-15620134492564517992014-01-20T18:26:00.000+00:002014-01-20T18:26:46.212+00:00Written in November<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUQAkCsRxuQpMVGWZj1irSmKAmHbOkppPPue3P3w44oWSv3__Hv7SSMo_lR1WKIkAnQYpgNZ3w3PQ99c7Gsiiv1s9cv26yTwVuAhVxjmaUU3OTZ0jJUw14cC3o0DhoB6Nwr19qIcSWGaXr/s1600/IMG_20131006_221750.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiUQAkCsRxuQpMVGWZj1irSmKAmHbOkppPPue3P3w44oWSv3__Hv7SSMo_lR1WKIkAnQYpgNZ3w3PQ99c7Gsiiv1s9cv26yTwVuAhVxjmaUU3OTZ0jJUw14cC3o0DhoB6Nwr19qIcSWGaXr/s1600/IMG_20131006_221750.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I wrote this in November.<br />
<br />
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i>Recently, these things:</i></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i>Tying up bunting on a veranda, sheets of rain. On a horizontal cross piece between two vertical wooden supports, the tiny mummified skeleton of a bat. White bones, remnants of red brown fur.</i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i>The stick of the white kitchen tiles against my back as I watch the girl from Benin mix crepe batter in her too-warm kitchen. Watch her open sachets of vanilla sugar, zest a lime. </i></span></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i><br /></i></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i>A boat, noisy, the spray of water, the smell of petrol. And the speed, fast, so fast, so that with the sky above and the sky reflected on the river below, and the upwards angle of the boat itself, it feels like we’re flying. The way home, one motor not working, the craft low in the water, and slower than before. The setting sun, everything pink and gold, burnished, beautiful.</i></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i>An ant bite, on my right thigh, that is painful, and hot to the touch, like a burn.</i></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i>All these things. And this – that a cream envelope with a blue stamp can land on your desk. Inside, a thick card, embossed with the image of a tandem bicycle, two names and a save the date. On the reverse, handwritten in blue ink, two more names, mine and his, 'Dear B --- & M ---, hope you can make it'. A wave of sadness then. At what was, but no longer is.</i></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><span style="color: black; font-family: inherit; font-size: small;"></span></i></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i>For days the heat building and building, unbearable. Until yesterday, after work, the air cool, the sky bruise-coloured, yellow, grey, deep blue. A storm coming. Today we woke to grey skies, rain, seemingly endless.</i></span><br />
<span style="color: black; font-family: inherit;"><i><br /></i></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQzixrU3O6vY0vkQ0IRz07CdrhuMycNEAhmWfsTeg7K68wJiX42RsyhKragmJC-Sl530ahUMucHajNVLab4jkwciv6S7H9qlQqwojEu5BDpXFScCL3xm3VzexRHJAxve-1dUeppr7SFOJi/s1600/IMG_20131121_174025.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjQzixrU3O6vY0vkQ0IRz07CdrhuMycNEAhmWfsTeg7K68wJiX42RsyhKragmJC-Sl530ahUMucHajNVLab4jkwciv6S7H9qlQqwojEu5BDpXFScCL3xm3VzexRHJAxve-1dUeppr7SFOJi/s1600/IMG_20131121_174025.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyCP-FuKWr3v_oDwQJH1baTkHU_UFLQrvrvFj8ZHn1a9fFlRgNIMRE6p7FYFuvJEDc0UaPKGNqjx-sNxOIGVH9cY1FkOJi7UzU2MeBmAGytlXT8yDKExsAdzZCyJQYNQ0dsxYJXZJsgGrs/s1600/IMG_20131019_205546.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyCP-FuKWr3v_oDwQJH1baTkHU_UFLQrvrvFj8ZHn1a9fFlRgNIMRE6p7FYFuvJEDc0UaPKGNqjx-sNxOIGVH9cY1FkOJi7UzU2MeBmAGytlXT8yDKExsAdzZCyJQYNQ0dsxYJXZJsgGrs/s1600/IMG_20131019_205546.jpg" height="320" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="MsoNormal" style="color: #222222; margin: 0cm 0cm 0pt;">
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-42132718029575875152013-10-23T18:56:00.000+01:002013-10-23T18:56:01.003+01:00Autumn from afar<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCWBeyJwbQwZKKkI74rAjKhxFJvOIp-zkilRC9-EOyNJcBVjxFjuK8-sEhxjWQjc0QWXyNtkPJpoQsde8wIwrnQMyM44_RoKVBrBBwcQXZD7LvYbu6BLNQO5c_nCWCiCG1kynmVxqUqDYB/s1600/IMG_1822.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgCWBeyJwbQwZKKkI74rAjKhxFJvOIp-zkilRC9-EOyNJcBVjxFjuK8-sEhxjWQjc0QWXyNtkPJpoQsde8wIwrnQMyM44_RoKVBrBBwcQXZD7LvYbu6BLNQO5c_nCWCiCG1kynmVxqUqDYB/s1200/IMG_1822.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Somewhere, it is autumn. Somewhere, the leaves are turning, russet, gold. Not here. Here there is only dry season, and wet. Rainy season now, and the hot days and dramatic storms that come with it. The flame trees are in bloom. Sometimes, driving to work, I glimpse one of them, mistake the blazing orange flowers above </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
for autumn leaves in their final moments of glory before fall. Feel a twinge of sadness that I am missing my favourite season. California dreaming in reverse. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
***</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
This time last year we drove to Wales for a long weekend. Left London one Friday lunchtime, my little red car packed with waterproofs and walking boots, wellingtons, tins of flapjack and brownies. M and I taking turns driving, The National on the stereo. Crossing rivers and counties, eating jelly babies. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
We arrived first. Drove down the sweeping drive, house, creeper covered, sandy stoned, breathtaking in the setting sun before us. Found our way to the converted stable block at the rear where we would be staying. Had time to explore the many rooms, quirky bedrooms, bathrooms with views of sheep fields, huge living room, huge kitchen. Had time to light a fire and pour a whiskey before the others arrived, university friends travelling from London, Oxford, South Wales, a dozen of us in total.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
And then, the most perfect autumn weekend. An escape from the city, an escape from the lists and planning and French grammar exercises that had already crept into my life only a few weeks after having accepted the job in DRC. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Mulled wine. Charades by firelight, and wink murder. Pumpkin carving. Communal cooking, bangers and mash, chilli beans, Full English. Toast with K's homemade raspberry jam. Bananagrams on the vast dining room table. Rambling country walks down leaf strewn lanes and alongside babbling rivers, through mud and over stiles. Exploring the garden, getting lost in the beech maze. Buying eggs from the farm shop, and the last of the rainbow chard. Plucking blackberries from hedgerows. Waking early, before the rest of the house, leaving M warm in bed, pulling on boots and slipping out the door to the first of the morning sunlight, leaves still frosted on the lawn. The stillness, the silence. The cold air with each intake of breath. The red of the Virginia creeper, the maple, golden beech and oak. Tiny mushrooms growing in tree stumps. A bright red and green gypsy caravan parked by two red tractors. The walled kitchen garden with late cornflowers and lupins, apples ripe on trees. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
***</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
A couple of bits of housekeeping:</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
1) A big, belated and cross-continental thank you to <a href="http://seedsandstitches.com/">Hannah Seeds and Stitches</a> for her <a href="http://seedsandstitches.com/new-blog-thoughts-blogging/">very lovely mention a few of posts back</a>. Truly, truly, made my day, and sorry I haven't thanked you until now. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
2) My posts are sporadic, even more so now that I am all the way in Africa, with internet that even at the best of times is not speedy, so I have now got a 'subscribe' option - top right - which should mean you get a nice little email straight to your inbox every time that I post.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2Y0vQ_IN7ywiVjUvHLe78uO2drs2i-dWkKNzEwk6cBrPzGDC6ypWTO_BnMM1rLB3D5VTJ2-Y1lMsNECejdbveN8s33IgasQ5Zo_OCHFWKc2-Xa2QbeGPr_U7PVCNEeUFX8IehHW8m_ONy/s1600/IMG_1790.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg2Y0vQ_IN7ywiVjUvHLe78uO2drs2i-dWkKNzEwk6cBrPzGDC6ypWTO_BnMM1rLB3D5VTJ2-Y1lMsNECejdbveN8s33IgasQ5Zo_OCHFWKc2-Xa2QbeGPr_U7PVCNEeUFX8IehHW8m_ONy/s1200/IMG_1790.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9HDNQzab-j4ODrwsme8GyeCm-aIp-KFzm8upCrP6zB4nGE0tOLp6jpf6nbYDxg20y5Gh0l1hthVBybmS3ER9fXo38l0it7qlRhieQTcEfU3xi33BmPi3lYLZSGKDk-sl1D7PVdxFm00jv/s1600/IMG_1677.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh9HDNQzab-j4ODrwsme8GyeCm-aIp-KFzm8upCrP6zB4nGE0tOLp6jpf6nbYDxg20y5Gh0l1hthVBybmS3ER9fXo38l0it7qlRhieQTcEfU3xi33BmPi3lYLZSGKDk-sl1D7PVdxFm00jv/s1200/IMG_1677.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOFu3b0dkGH9Duxd-VIZ0zLAfxKU-vVge0r_s93VfA_aJNRDtippPAU0XHLbVHGopGDa31U_-k71hFhs2uTzljJEcJoZsgWW8CHu7t0FnArmPpF1xthhaV9EmFOxvUkJasing2Ps8jIulg/s1600/IMG_1708.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiOFu3b0dkGH9Duxd-VIZ0zLAfxKU-vVge0r_s93VfA_aJNRDtippPAU0XHLbVHGopGDa31U_-k71hFhs2uTzljJEcJoZsgWW8CHu7t0FnArmPpF1xthhaV9EmFOxvUkJasing2Ps8jIulg/s1200/IMG_1708.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVMdQtG1jOFqCQUETqaXyri-NvHFkIugBFd2js_pE82lo_i-oHkbZKX-l25ghg9nehhGwu2yDztzZy5n2vUDt9T0bPR0H51G-YM5SOrbbVgwa2gWMT0qcAApC5XfCj0BxtPWb-sAsUlwA5/s1600/IMG_1770.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVMdQtG1jOFqCQUETqaXyri-NvHFkIugBFd2js_pE82lo_i-oHkbZKX-l25ghg9nehhGwu2yDztzZy5n2vUDt9T0bPR0H51G-YM5SOrbbVgwa2gWMT0qcAApC5XfCj0BxtPWb-sAsUlwA5/s1200/IMG_1770.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzi5-CijLSJBG2_MUnPMAfN9FKyFCs4z3ufmsClsYZvm58D6SIMRG-5-wYzlbcoH6Jwln8TuPm28-vFZmgr24zXH53lLk2nOeAbMA-K_k8yp0arXB6842PH-11ASaVk8edwOPT_5kqD1vg/s1600/IMG_1815.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhzi5-CijLSJBG2_MUnPMAfN9FKyFCs4z3ufmsClsYZvm58D6SIMRG-5-wYzlbcoH6Jwln8TuPm28-vFZmgr24zXH53lLk2nOeAbMA-K_k8yp0arXB6842PH-11ASaVk8edwOPT_5kqD1vg/s1200/IMG_1815.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdbi2pA6Szqik39jM9tb3gtKssBi0BWH-scDPPzrn-52GDy0McRWLHzimg3u7DZse2RfeM4PYbxb8JQ3GAyPcrfCcEXmhTDgr2hFl6o1TJYqrRsdtCS7xO-fjD4Cq33NZhO7fOhK0nRpg8/s1600/IMG_1738.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjdbi2pA6Szqik39jM9tb3gtKssBi0BWH-scDPPzrn-52GDy0McRWLHzimg3u7DZse2RfeM4PYbxb8JQ3GAyPcrfCcEXmhTDgr2hFl6o1TJYqrRsdtCS7xO-fjD4Cq33NZhO7fOhK0nRpg8/s1200/IMG_1738.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8qG61LlSLABQc5OqPycb34-mWRwJLUSBaiqUllDs_PQ0IV1jWkZ8nvh3YhaWf4EFShvKJQUBy3bG-A56h8mAVTqas892e-EDZhZVM-4Jd75sw0H6P8GwLcc0rhxZzy3TtBMmdbuwMt5-N/s1600/IMG_1902.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg8qG61LlSLABQc5OqPycb34-mWRwJLUSBaiqUllDs_PQ0IV1jWkZ8nvh3YhaWf4EFShvKJQUBy3bG-A56h8mAVTqas892e-EDZhZVM-4Jd75sw0H6P8GwLcc0rhxZzy3TtBMmdbuwMt5-N/s1200/IMG_1902.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip2S-JswAevOAsSXU5ku7VqyxvjZeCTPcoCJu85GsAO5ULaL6TY1ufTzTuc_WRDi9i5hSAUWi2RuUoeGL7UzaGh6maQU-bqHB6ENIy_kogidh33vU-29vY_42mBnQPNjUsblmsEPUxxUjR/s1600/IMG_1854.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEip2S-JswAevOAsSXU5ku7VqyxvjZeCTPcoCJu85GsAO5ULaL6TY1ufTzTuc_WRDi9i5hSAUWi2RuUoeGL7UzaGh6maQU-bqHB6ENIy_kogidh33vU-29vY_42mBnQPNjUsblmsEPUxxUjR/s1200/IMG_1854.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1sEKoIvopxUCibJECqPwhcT1RZUOLJzolx1XB9H0AyMnfjlVgGS41R7LCTOjGV3tD2sTx4tamFUuhWnyGlqD_1eY0b9fs6uJ4VuNhf0UGBF_Ltl0npgxZlo7t4Z64PUhNap_J70CKUUM8/s1600/IMG_1914.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj1sEKoIvopxUCibJECqPwhcT1RZUOLJzolx1XB9H0AyMnfjlVgGS41R7LCTOjGV3tD2sTx4tamFUuhWnyGlqD_1eY0b9fs6uJ4VuNhf0UGBF_Ltl0npgxZlo7t4Z64PUhNap_J70CKUUM8/s1200/IMG_1914.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJE2ovV4BFFhp7dYr4YMtDEgd_hXiZmi64etNb_ubseenqyZoVNUpB2ySRCDp8jYsuj6kdsw84ZLjmGhrDIHs4918A0LnuT5mqttaTjNXhOBCLKkorDgEh7NWKaZlF9-J6Skmm_oyBG3AG/s1600/IMG_1734.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJE2ovV4BFFhp7dYr4YMtDEgd_hXiZmi64etNb_ubseenqyZoVNUpB2ySRCDp8jYsuj6kdsw84ZLjmGhrDIHs4918A0LnuT5mqttaTjNXhOBCLKkorDgEh7NWKaZlF9-J6Skmm_oyBG3AG/s1200/IMG_1734.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglMfaO21NCAXl5A4Ey6t8fw4_2fgsbqqo-IGjYdSnqVhEI0rU5-CHwWLD6C89dTy5r9-aGdMaox4lJZF0gRVO2K_B2lIExgKAJz9DiFZUz0X2WtEIcTCu9tw90vdLwNeKghh_EnI4sybfI/s1600/IMG_1813.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEglMfaO21NCAXl5A4Ey6t8fw4_2fgsbqqo-IGjYdSnqVhEI0rU5-CHwWLD6C89dTy5r9-aGdMaox4lJZF0gRVO2K_B2lIExgKAJz9DiFZUz0X2WtEIcTCu9tw90vdLwNeKghh_EnI4sybfI/s1200/IMG_1813.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSEhMR8vVi-qR3KhFTTXMomCsM2ivAXSM8LbhfEcqE8HVd5z8Nteh_m7GkeQY0BlQOc9kQ_YMcZSVyRuw6ojpQznJ1janW9la6aj2YviTge-X6mvqm6PSHV_CrwdE4yEi0lpSnlq_gsMkK/s1600/IMG_1730.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgSEhMR8vVi-qR3KhFTTXMomCsM2ivAXSM8LbhfEcqE8HVd5z8Nteh_m7GkeQY0BlQOc9kQ_YMcZSVyRuw6ojpQznJ1janW9la6aj2YviTge-X6mvqm6PSHV_CrwdE4yEi0lpSnlq_gsMkK/s1200/IMG_1730.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjE_iJo-dhiv11qAvG1f5ajoUi89PyD1mdM1FR-SgiUuWUVdGv2sXuH3jmrOsDfLkZNBUfcG_68oobJ8BMdsqrdbZXhuYewQSiq5TFP-QehSpKyVndDfktDbKWcljYnoz1KtBAyGYamJIFy/s1600/IMG_1788.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjE_iJo-dhiv11qAvG1f5ajoUi89PyD1mdM1FR-SgiUuWUVdGv2sXuH3jmrOsDfLkZNBUfcG_68oobJ8BMdsqrdbZXhuYewQSiq5TFP-QehSpKyVndDfktDbKWcljYnoz1KtBAyGYamJIFy/s1200/IMG_1788.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGROfPBsIAgs4zUemBdnOlZUoxaLRkNNnC2bhfyGK4l2UJx47v8L2rX9Pw3YZQGup5Y3EiVBzlHqGqVPXe8j6FJGN1koNHPFoZUY8uOf5RVifWUP2-AZVkoEUETmQxwicXpUyyKIG1i-X_/s1600/IMG_1797.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhGROfPBsIAgs4zUemBdnOlZUoxaLRkNNnC2bhfyGK4l2UJx47v8L2rX9Pw3YZQGup5Y3EiVBzlHqGqVPXe8j6FJGN1koNHPFoZUY8uOf5RVifWUP2-AZVkoEUETmQxwicXpUyyKIG1i-X_/s1200/IMG_1797.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP3zaWeo3FUKjeXGcng4SWa8DPCQb6N6Kn1t_YM68Wd6nZdms5jtc5YrmOWDL1Xw3NLKQlZvW_D7l5aZQx60kWsWFBxZw9mRJU0uu5nxRNtaWbUJm0Qk-HWw1tWxm30kWf17Dzp7LXl6Ap/s1600/IMG_1802.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjP3zaWeo3FUKjeXGcng4SWa8DPCQb6N6Kn1t_YM68Wd6nZdms5jtc5YrmOWDL1Xw3NLKQlZvW_D7l5aZQx60kWsWFBxZw9mRJU0uu5nxRNtaWbUJm0Qk-HWw1tWxm30kWf17Dzp7LXl6Ap/s1200/IMG_1802.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVGpvdNtSjmEjZ_ahN1y-Zg8fsfMZ_qkT743dA5W1elylKlSr6e9s_55nTRbOqsUShIo2RCQXbnLPZIp2xYKXBeToaWSyjFpGqlPgZwIOc-QyaAs3hP5c-aV86-4wn9XqL5tj0PVBPgK0e/s1600/IMG_1855.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiVGpvdNtSjmEjZ_ahN1y-Zg8fsfMZ_qkT743dA5W1elylKlSr6e9s_55nTRbOqsUShIo2RCQXbnLPZIp2xYKXBeToaWSyjFpGqlPgZwIOc-QyaAs3hP5c-aV86-4wn9XqL5tj0PVBPgK0e/s1200/IMG_1855.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHx-kGrs-aB3ure4JZE6jtbD_5MoDu1o4CTFJie3QB6iVkkzcQMe_iheS4JVmAV6ti5ieriorhU0j5-RcJEpfNa6tDsoG25mvs_Qr5Pukz4oUnwlUotdaqXUtD_C0LEiSZ8t8B7UxAtEWt/s1600/IMG_1934.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgHx-kGrs-aB3ure4JZE6jtbD_5MoDu1o4CTFJie3QB6iVkkzcQMe_iheS4JVmAV6ti5ieriorhU0j5-RcJEpfNa6tDsoG25mvs_Qr5Pukz4oUnwlUotdaqXUtD_C0LEiSZ8t8B7UxAtEWt/s1200/IMG_1934.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrvK4QUznNRvU5cBFzjgZ_7fGpx8rqseowxznRpfRTvPzKnf7ZAcpt3wbKD7_YbWp3tuuSXaw3aANzbui8B2sy0tBDsHFd00ELHxPcMqXKpSv8NqyskauJQSosT6n_cnVbahqxJZdD7eU/s1600/IMG_1809.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhyrvK4QUznNRvU5cBFzjgZ_7fGpx8rqseowxznRpfRTvPzKnf7ZAcpt3wbKD7_YbWp3tuuSXaw3aANzbui8B2sy0tBDsHFd00ELHxPcMqXKpSv8NqyskauJQSosT6n_cnVbahqxJZdD7eU/s1200/IMG_1809.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-31586804211391698072013-09-25T23:45:00.001+01:002013-09-25T23:46:47.920+01:00Paint<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOfFEL_FZvWv9hqgxoe3Ie6u7hcXyzBKRp4hp-vSYluMfCn70wfnf_KfUt8D5yW4py0rdmYAc97HX6YurblFPo77DcMsd6jcMpFvRa-7CtUAdlz1fmA9vXgcZwa4jk3GdLBHn2Rx-IS-lg/s1600/IMG_20130407_214540.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhOfFEL_FZvWv9hqgxoe3Ie6u7hcXyzBKRp4hp-vSYluMfCn70wfnf_KfUt8D5yW4py0rdmYAc97HX6YurblFPo77DcMsd6jcMpFvRa-7CtUAdlz1fmA9vXgcZwa4jk3GdLBHn2Rx-IS-lg/s1200/IMG_20130407_214540.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
The relentless tumble of life here, and suddenly it is September, and I have been here over six months, and it is starting, slowly, tentatively, in a two steps forward with the occasional lurch backward kind of way, to feel like home. Not fully, I still yearn for London, a dull longing that I am not sure will ever go away, and there are people I miss always, at times painfully so.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
The week in August when I received news of a friend's engagement, a relationship begun on the green lawns of Cambridge, now to be life. An advance email with the news, before Facebook filtered it to impersonality. I was grateful for that at least. The same week, the news of another friend getting their dream job, the one they've been working towards for as long as I've known them. The sadness of knowing that you aren't there to celebrate either occasion, to raise a glass and punch the air and grin and grin and grin. Instead there is the moon, low and full and red above the water tower, the throb of cicadas and frogs to fill the night and the heavy weight of distance. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">The evening when a Congolese colleague, asks me if I like it here, if I am happy, I say, <i>Oui, mais c'est...je ne connais pas le mot en francais...'bittersweet'</i>. Because I am here, here, in a courtyard in Africa, under an avocado tree, eating river fish and fried plantain, cassava leaves, to the light of candles in the growing darkness, but I am so, so, far from home.</span></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
A low point, a few weeks ago, just before going on leave to New York. The thought of being torn between two places for the next three years suddenly seeming like too much. S, a friend and colleague, says to me <span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><i>well, you could always quit, go back to London</i>. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">As though that is an option. </span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">To leave here.</span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">To leave the bats which dip and swoop over the red clay tennis courts, catching the insects drawn to the floodlit expanse. The moths as big as my hand which flap in confusion under these artificial moons.</span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">To leave river sunsets. To leave the tumble of </span><span style="color: #222222;">bougainvillea</span><span style="color: #222222; font-family: inherit;"> over whitewashed walls, or orange trumpet flowered creepers on telegraph poles.</span><br />
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">To leave nights dancing and dancing on flashing dancefloors until the early hours. Crawling into bed at 5am, exhausted, utterly, but happy, unquestionably.</span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">To leave hand painted advertisements, dusty roads. Rainfall heavy and sudden.</span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
The work which can be undeniably hard, challenging, frustrating at times, but also ultimately absorbing, fascinating, satisfying. </div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Hummingbirds in the office car park, jewel bright blurs between red flowers.</span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">Mangoes, fallen from trees, smashed to an orange, fragrant pulp on the running circuit tarmac. </span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<br /></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
No, it hadn't even crossed my mind. <span style="font-family: inherit;">To consider leaving here already.</span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;">This is just the beginning. </span></div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFn_uWYyCI3jB87oGMccssPdX3DYd4J45Lmh0wWhs_rc7K87TDPH-Ok8_E6ZJV5A_8SDOxO9pWycfuHEJNCAnRFH10fUFYn49RoYrVlnqAwU29qfkj24q1kRLqRhdEfs3ROmov4gx8JIKg/s1600/IMG_20130407_220802.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgFn_uWYyCI3jB87oGMccssPdX3DYd4J45Lmh0wWhs_rc7K87TDPH-Ok8_E6ZJV5A_8SDOxO9pWycfuHEJNCAnRFH10fUFYn49RoYrVlnqAwU29qfkj24q1kRLqRhdEfs3ROmov4gx8JIKg/s1200/IMG_20130407_220802.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihED5zbNnHVBQBMBYf4hJty2j7jpUi-CWNaUy_0E6Fzq137WxjgkAWcTkiddXBZku-cE2YQecitkUuuON0paeJvDV2n7EOUHfB4JekOxRi9G9hb6vi3qLDy86u4MKNbDGpI-APOsPM1P-8/s1600/IMG_20130423_190600.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEihED5zbNnHVBQBMBYf4hJty2j7jpUi-CWNaUy_0E6Fzq137WxjgkAWcTkiddXBZku-cE2YQecitkUuuON0paeJvDV2n7EOUHfB4JekOxRi9G9hb6vi3qLDy86u4MKNbDGpI-APOsPM1P-8/s1200/IMG_20130423_190600.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7dNETNwcgAMZRrLBtV034Lb5O44TNjOiTxWS5XvztYMqDgeOMmOfV51qEj5lAw5gDcEqTysV0ijgLQhogfGFQhigY7W77uD2luUe_3mjHqXJymDeY6ael9xN5C6c67yavxfZVko_dBfO5/s1600/IMG_20130513_222202.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh7dNETNwcgAMZRrLBtV034Lb5O44TNjOiTxWS5XvztYMqDgeOMmOfV51qEj5lAw5gDcEqTysV0ijgLQhogfGFQhigY7W77uD2luUe_3mjHqXJymDeY6ael9xN5C6c67yavxfZVko_dBfO5/s1200/IMG_20130513_222202.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnlyD0sEszgcXvq2JWcfIn9qbhBTJZDTMrNqP7g4euZrYE6VqONjt7hhotJxDEHSQDkkeE88lM64_RUWqV0l1n4j1luVED9zGYYXuVLypH5fjZv9S9YPIvKlODYE6OXxArzW6RfirhuNz5/s1600/IMG_20130724_194935.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhnlyD0sEszgcXvq2JWcfIn9qbhBTJZDTMrNqP7g4euZrYE6VqONjt7hhotJxDEHSQDkkeE88lM64_RUWqV0l1n4j1luVED9zGYYXuVLypH5fjZv9S9YPIvKlODYE6OXxArzW6RfirhuNz5/s1200/IMG_20130724_194935.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjp8_A18kObBaJ5crgb63ICu8qu6yGOllKZ0GArk80e2Qq9DX0uknMAF0oTYXCYEcztkBCUaKgx7DYn8E4kK0XhPLIAn05wLYYCDyNBIV38pOteLsvkCR_b0niMmZGUIN0zyIU3THqSlPFJ/s1600/IMG_20130513_223001.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjp8_A18kObBaJ5crgb63ICu8qu6yGOllKZ0GArk80e2Qq9DX0uknMAF0oTYXCYEcztkBCUaKgx7DYn8E4kK0XhPLIAn05wLYYCDyNBIV38pOteLsvkCR_b0niMmZGUIN0zyIU3THqSlPFJ/s1200/IMG_20130513_223001.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYt6RXBYIbxHagc9szjObYfONnPcHVzT1aHChVQvIRXHx7qFMry60AdDw_leUb9hL3dkYaC6ABUKqW04Z374emdJFvuzUVMU6kOs0V1vRV90Yg5qykvoMFRBRbtjfmDv6u2KmC4yztNDp7/s1600/IMG_20130423_212040.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhYt6RXBYIbxHagc9szjObYfONnPcHVzT1aHChVQvIRXHx7qFMry60AdDw_leUb9hL3dkYaC6ABUKqW04Z374emdJFvuzUVMU6kOs0V1vRV90Yg5qykvoMFRBRbtjfmDv6u2KmC4yztNDp7/s1200/IMG_20130423_212040.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<br />Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com8tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-43015004693735451352013-07-24T23:11:00.000+01:002013-07-24T23:11:11.098+01:00The View from Car Windows<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQFscHS-5Z1WsbR7KuUvSpTvS5wpsFS4LHiSQgWSHgcf172XpFGygLE6L8BswzGt5Y_gjoBsXUSdMovRbltNrCwkLk1w7stDRBuvpV9iEf3BJqIowZIqOj2slFbHxfHsttvdd1IvQEpdV0/s1600/IMG_20130513_222921.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQFscHS-5Z1WsbR7KuUvSpTvS5wpsFS4LHiSQgWSHgcf172XpFGygLE6L8BswzGt5Y_gjoBsXUSdMovRbltNrCwkLk1w7stDRBuvpV9iEf3BJqIowZIqOj2slFbHxfHsttvdd1IvQEpdV0/s1200/IMG_20130513_222921.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I haven't been using <a href="http://www.teacupscupcakes.blogspot.com/2013/07/puddles.html">puddles</a>, but instead, the view from car windows. Snippets of a city and the surrounding countryside, taken on my camera phone as they move past the glass. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
The bright blue and yellow taxi buses, rust spotted. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Goats in car boots, on the roof rack of minibuses. Men with entire newsagents balanced on their heads, or fifty dozen eggs. At traffic lights, people selling giant wall maps, anatomically correct diagrams of the human body, dog leashes with no dogs, others selling dogs with no leashes. Once, a monkey, another time, a tiny terrapin, suspended on a string. Packets and packets of tissues, waved energetically in front of your windscreen whilst stuck at a red light. Roadside pepinieres, rows of plants grown in plastic bags, hibiscus and baby palms, gardenia and cactus. Vehicles overloaded with all manner of things, people, firewood, bundles of cassava leaves. Potholes and road sweepers, piles of dust. Trees made from exhaust pipes. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyEej2fPo008-daqo5gFD5-IHvzBsAwqXIj1IJoN2GpRMrRe_iJxEap1vX68b9d1nJOL5ea7bB_6j12zNDekPdPxJFoFMhqdU3U_MwvCJPDkzaX5bjoq-6AuKW5bgsi-bE3hyphenhyphen5T3VhKFE1/s1600/IMG_20130513_222424.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyEej2fPo008-daqo5gFD5-IHvzBsAwqXIj1IJoN2GpRMrRe_iJxEap1vX68b9d1nJOL5ea7bB_6j12zNDekPdPxJFoFMhqdU3U_MwvCJPDkzaX5bjoq-6AuKW5bgsi-bE3hyphenhyphen5T3VhKFE1/s1200/IMG_20130513_222424.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz-oySKLxNG7V5-em7X3BQmyGbyPp8rmj7nNczNmID9-rice0V5Wur5H3VKijmWZA-OGN_KQfsfGbasxLOCmByD-0sAIsp9WKWZ7hm-wPnIqs8glx3R_u9v-pVqw-3SasyDA6LJPZunv44/s1600/IMG_20130513_221530.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjz-oySKLxNG7V5-em7X3BQmyGbyPp8rmj7nNczNmID9-rice0V5Wur5H3VKijmWZA-OGN_KQfsfGbasxLOCmByD-0sAIsp9WKWZ7hm-wPnIqs8glx3R_u9v-pVqw-3SasyDA6LJPZunv44/s1200/IMG_20130513_221530.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhx7Zk0vN13SRNENrWg3Y8dWUAABNycb1UfaXih8KnxiT_wGxO7YyJHqKlKruDb2lCoa0zLOOiK6-KH-zeyP5Az3-0TQ-bRlWnxWjFGzW2LdxTEcKs0scCTJg7hHKWFTEsAQf2apx2Upn1w/s1600/IMG_20130513_222247.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhx7Zk0vN13SRNENrWg3Y8dWUAABNycb1UfaXih8KnxiT_wGxO7YyJHqKlKruDb2lCoa0zLOOiK6-KH-zeyP5Az3-0TQ-bRlWnxWjFGzW2LdxTEcKs0scCTJg7hHKWFTEsAQf2apx2Upn1w/s1200/IMG_20130513_222247.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv9bM5_5j4KNDENYKjz42fd1aMTRKeRUs4VSg-KhgMKM0fuOm_ZDzkpG4PLLCe-jfpUALbpcqh0d4uNeMJdsgYq0EN1oh1ZU4hd_TDw1KPs4Knwb2qlhVViOYKiOamU1jqkk9WQzX1Kwv2/s1600/IMG_20130513_223916.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiv9bM5_5j4KNDENYKjz42fd1aMTRKeRUs4VSg-KhgMKM0fuOm_ZDzkpG4PLLCe-jfpUALbpcqh0d4uNeMJdsgYq0EN1oh1ZU4hd_TDw1KPs4Knwb2qlhVViOYKiOamU1jqkk9WQzX1Kwv2/s1200/IMG_20130513_223916.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKSzsPzpnRtiMNBSq56D8IaozyNONWGbV0VSJ8jJYl2B7mTJw3MB5KM-dyPo_HXZWEnABtTnyEYyXpFbupIEJGPUVcvz5zGQfoHyHnrPO5J1iRlY4EMOgAvrEmq7jFhJhHHCVynLOpa4Fo/s1600/IMG_20130513_223438.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhKSzsPzpnRtiMNBSq56D8IaozyNONWGbV0VSJ8jJYl2B7mTJw3MB5KM-dyPo_HXZWEnABtTnyEYyXpFbupIEJGPUVcvz5zGQfoHyHnrPO5J1iRlY4EMOgAvrEmq7jFhJhHHCVynLOpa4Fo/s1200/IMG_20130513_223438.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqJn2aV2aiVPYvASZrjOJp-o0n_JYDAlzDHDW6_CCBchcU8yxMfJekU3wRoYk4ClSBqurmGSeew08sD2GZf4KNhLRzRUI_62bK2INbeYLqXnoXCVqhxCUMQ8HBS7DzEChHuP2zKbzCEB4G/s1600/IMG_20130513_224032.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhqJn2aV2aiVPYvASZrjOJp-o0n_JYDAlzDHDW6_CCBchcU8yxMfJekU3wRoYk4ClSBqurmGSeew08sD2GZf4KNhLRzRUI_62bK2INbeYLqXnoXCVqhxCUMQ8HBS7DzEChHuP2zKbzCEB4G/s320/IMG_20130513_224032.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK0H3k7kdoCo0fNPjhkGj3F3AsDH0OEDItlUT4AQW05UymSD6ebuDSF6uCMvl5BCmXcc3lv6853URe8zun0qjUBW5zyw2mLXOijm3KY6CIn6JMccD5mUafR6whmY-CKzoI-oaC_9pHxvAe/s1600/IMG_20130513_223136.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiK0H3k7kdoCo0fNPjhkGj3F3AsDH0OEDItlUT4AQW05UymSD6ebuDSF6uCMvl5BCmXcc3lv6853URe8zun0qjUBW5zyw2mLXOijm3KY6CIn6JMccD5mUafR6whmY-CKzoI-oaC_9pHxvAe/s1200/IMG_20130513_223136.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIW1RoBb0Bk4s4UU1yP-AxQK_yU5qz7cekUq0AK_wmzOnJCiGeSbxTAVwYLlUUaSU6s0E0W63EkdxZYRvzwnH2qx-53xCB6nutYTsIM3EOoK7YK1ozHTII10Q-zrdeVborFO9oBUPk6lZ7/s1600/IMG_20130513_222812.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgIW1RoBb0Bk4s4UU1yP-AxQK_yU5qz7cekUq0AK_wmzOnJCiGeSbxTAVwYLlUUaSU6s0E0W63EkdxZYRvzwnH2qx-53xCB6nutYTsIM3EOoK7YK1ozHTII10Q-zrdeVborFO9oBUPk6lZ7/s1200/IMG_20130513_222812.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0DddaIfbjBVr0bm-lk52Ti1w4V1vnqKUeSky22C4JaPOxxXxiAUv-O65hE8PY35B6GwPtQWmxDo1LbgwFNXuffeQ2Bq3rrdnAW5omz5G4JDVtbgMvdsRWLloVauEJ2HqOYqNViz-SnKO0/s1600/IMG_20130421_223551.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh0DddaIfbjBVr0bm-lk52Ti1w4V1vnqKUeSky22C4JaPOxxXxiAUv-O65hE8PY35B6GwPtQWmxDo1LbgwFNXuffeQ2Bq3rrdnAW5omz5G4JDVtbgMvdsRWLloVauEJ2HqOYqNViz-SnKO0/s1200/IMG_20130421_223551.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvUv7NgcE5Z5nnDDZgsr6aDkTGG2-KfhxQCZZqulOW4Y1d7C7Mx0FytjJLQZ_vzeVr1IHd9cy9BqGeDMJ-92AW1HIupY1Evm8YaB5PtD3XJyWTRISqw6yPIEXsw0cNiOudYZ-iWYNgo3xx/s1600/IMG_20130422_184854.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjvUv7NgcE5Z5nnDDZgsr6aDkTGG2-KfhxQCZZqulOW4Y1d7C7Mx0FytjJLQZ_vzeVr1IHd9cy9BqGeDMJ-92AW1HIupY1Evm8YaB5PtD3XJyWTRISqw6yPIEXsw0cNiOudYZ-iWYNgo3xx/s1200/IMG_20130422_184854.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com2tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-58449216280688469932013-07-15T23:07:00.002+01:002013-07-15T23:07:44.737+01:00Puddles<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZaZY7htoJd-oxTlURqVGoN236OOa0N6iCGXFBwe3tS6Ew4o8Az_X9Dw6VqIVb2lZ6hrgO1ApdbnkL-Mtpo6zMzSkWAlIuQvS2lsU2LwJ_x0PJ5Ct9CQnty2zbocukfqK5c537q-VpHig1/s1600/med_katembo_05-copie-jpg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZaZY7htoJd-oxTlURqVGoN236OOa0N6iCGXFBwe3tS6Ew4o8Az_X9Dw6VqIVb2lZ6hrgO1ApdbnkL-Mtpo6zMzSkWAlIuQvS2lsU2LwJ_x0PJ5Ct9CQnty2zbocukfqK5c537q-VpHig1/s1200/med_katembo_05-copie-jpg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
About a week in from being back in Kinshasa, still feeling glum at how very far I was away from my beloved London, I found myself at the Institut Francais one early evening after work. Found myself in a white walled room, bare save for the photographs on the walls, an exhibition of the work of photographer <a href="http://www.photo-festivals.com/kiripi-katembo/">Kiripi Katembo</a>.<br />
<br />
Photographs of Kinshasa reflected in puddles, a mirrored city of blue and pink skies, floating rubbish. Beautiful somehow, despite the litter. And I don't know if it was the art, or the evening light, or the inventiveness, in a city where it is mostly frowned upon to take photographs and in some places downright forbidden, of using puddles to capture your images, but I went away a little bit more light-hearted than before.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimOpabxpJPh4XZZ6oVsg692SIKy1TzoG65tno2HnPMzpg4WBQOfaCMR9bQ11yT_UjLTR68eTzRR2KNOR_PV-5Zmdq-3F6SM9CeslpRe1_zpjpNeYuGTqiD_A5i0HTXmFzWZ645FFVbYAxI/s1600/med_katembo_03-copie-jpg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimOpabxpJPh4XZZ6oVsg692SIKy1TzoG65tno2HnPMzpg4WBQOfaCMR9bQ11yT_UjLTR68eTzRR2KNOR_PV-5Zmdq-3F6SM9CeslpRe1_zpjpNeYuGTqiD_A5i0HTXmFzWZ645FFVbYAxI/s1200/med_katembo_03-copie-jpg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3ac7_WPreVEo4K4AkaKVg6I6bZfvRvvsuiGp64lyJlC75MyEm3iOAU89ZQ_HP9QCb5m69-yz3JKCX1LPfp_vHElF2gBc54TMf3mhm7mWmksL8ckxOwyAaY1jtydwOschrPuepD_2oi4YZ/s1600/med_katembo_07-copie-jpg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh3ac7_WPreVEo4K4AkaKVg6I6bZfvRvvsuiGp64lyJlC75MyEm3iOAU89ZQ_HP9QCb5m69-yz3JKCX1LPfp_vHElF2gBc54TMf3mhm7mWmksL8ckxOwyAaY1jtydwOschrPuepD_2oi4YZ/s1200/med_katembo_07-copie-jpg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD8yOo7sbaWIPSOnog2joykELNjhQaGihCYmmRN5255iHwyYZA704nfYYAykE1Sop__hpxPs7L6uZc_V2YfF7dy5Cz9yy9OqF3HYMf_yE6mpOKR4jBsYxdTE3Kl3iPEDJScrbCjzG28GVG/s1600/med_katembo_04-copie-jpg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgD8yOo7sbaWIPSOnog2joykELNjhQaGihCYmmRN5255iHwyYZA704nfYYAykE1Sop__hpxPs7L6uZc_V2YfF7dy5Cz9yy9OqF3HYMf_yE6mpOKR4jBsYxdTE3Kl3iPEDJScrbCjzG28GVG/s1200/med_katembo_04-copie-jpg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiApSmAOHOdukGj0agF4dlPESHauP-qXL_coUz_NBVpRjpD9XrwbFVmuL-IRa-zUCAKo4m3X8WCPHhNKEKNEuGwDY5q61zPfsa47MWPtRXXdzEkD5L37TJ5D8jI3g6hUWaiuv7qXNeRfrmy/s1600/med_katembo_01-copie-jpg.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiApSmAOHOdukGj0agF4dlPESHauP-qXL_coUz_NBVpRjpD9XrwbFVmuL-IRa-zUCAKo4m3X8WCPHhNKEKNEuGwDY5q61zPfsa47MWPtRXXdzEkD5L37TJ5D8jI3g6hUWaiuv7qXNeRfrmy/s1200/med_katembo_01-copie-jpg.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-32042947219663121622013-06-25T23:04:00.002+01:002013-06-25T23:04:39.769+01:00In the Past Two Months<div style="text-align: center;">
Part I</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4Z4eHYOz0fgKzNcTQnv7phg5MU_OGHyXa-2xjRIWT6Uukx_4MgGJrKyMnXkWtEQfzdt2Mdt975LhO_SJancn4-QiS_3c6ri079iD01_4f5jAV03hjdrm5jwraY_Gs8bYYS2LLfJMcmvkQ/s1600/IMG_20130428_093458.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg4Z4eHYOz0fgKzNcTQnv7phg5MU_OGHyXa-2xjRIWT6Uukx_4MgGJrKyMnXkWtEQfzdt2Mdt975LhO_SJancn4-QiS_3c6ri079iD01_4f5jAV03hjdrm5jwraY_Gs8bYYS2LLfJMcmvkQ/s1200/IMG_20130428_093458.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
M came to stay. Suitcase loaded full of chocolate and almonds and pesto and all the things you can't get out here, or can but only for stupidly crazy imported prices (oh, First World problems). The initial bizareness of my new life and old life suddenly sharing the same sphere, replaced within a few days by how normal it felt. Camping trips, trips to see the Bonobos, breakfast on the balcony, afternoons by the pool, making pizza from scratch. When he left the flat suddenly felt empty, in a way it hadn't before, when there had only been me, before it had known his presence. He is now in Vancouver, with a new job, and once again we are across two continents, miles apart, Skype conversations at unsociable hours, mind always half on the next holiday, the next time we see each other.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
***</div>
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
Part II</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDkzZTpnMpXIKacr4tlzeGB_STNUVkbUrZQ5uJG-l6_AGB4QKAeOAJQuJ4pG3PU4AFtrty-gwqdeoXAWmAG0oxXxDxBrlKnv6T1Qwr3U5TaZkLqxl5r_QnIWDqRsgy_8v1xPLZdaZ6b_6f/s1600/IMG_20130522_171520.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDkzZTpnMpXIKacr4tlzeGB_STNUVkbUrZQ5uJG-l6_AGB4QKAeOAJQuJ4pG3PU4AFtrty-gwqdeoXAWmAG0oxXxDxBrlKnv6T1Qwr3U5TaZkLqxl5r_QnIWDqRsgy_8v1xPLZdaZ6b_6f/s1200/IMG_20130522_171520.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
I went back to England. It was glorious. Jam-packed and all over the place - Norfolk, London, Oxfordshire, Warwickshire, more London (lots of London), but truly glorious. Time spent with family, with friends, with M. Walking and walking and walking through the city. Museum trips in the middle of the day, Soho restaurants at night, holidaying in my home town, fully enjoying it and appreciating it.<br />
<br />
And now I am back, have been since the start of June. Post holiday blues of the worst kind, a crippling homesickness for London the entire first week back. The prospect of three years here suddenly daunting, when before it wasn't, or at least not so much.<br />
<br />
<div style="text-align: center;">
***</div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div style="text-align: center;">
Part III</div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXrdLqKyC8E1j7vjQn74mR_gFLPsfcZHK6J4CmFggFbaQM2ozDIwvvwFUlHFwr60EXN-oqBNX2ZuH7EloygLIyaXsp4D56d3P7Ysb9ZGcEAIuqfMLlSVFylV1v0bikS-d0pPHaPZHobfUl/s1600/IMG_20130625_221442.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgXrdLqKyC8E1j7vjQn74mR_gFLPsfcZHK6J4CmFggFbaQM2ozDIwvvwFUlHFwr60EXN-oqBNX2ZuH7EloygLIyaXsp4D56d3P7Ysb9ZGcEAIuqfMLlSVFylV1v0bikS-d0pPHaPZHobfUl/s1200/IMG_20130625_221442.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
But, but.<br />
<br />
I have been back three weeks now, and homesickness fades, like all things.<br />
<br />
You slip back into routines, reacquaint yourself with the things that were good about your new life here, before you were reminded of fresh milk and salad and drivers who pay attention to the Highway Code.<br />
<br />
Reacquaint yourself with setting suns the pink-orange of a not yet warmed up street-light, with the frogs who lurch sideways away from your approach as you arrive home after dark, with the neatly stacked piles of oranges and papaya, pyramids of increasing ripeness, carefully constructed by the fruit sellers at the side of the road.<br />
<br />
You begin to live again like this is for the long haul and not just a passing phase, plant squash and nasturtiums and feel glad that the basil flourished under the care of the friends who stopped by to water the plants while you were gone. Sign up for French lessons, because if there is one thing you definitely want from these three years it is to be actually good at French an<span style="text-align: center;">d not just passable. Hang some more of the pictures that have been leaning against walls since week 8 when you unpacked. Fight the urge to just.stay.home. watching box sets, instead make yourself put on insect repellent and a nice dress, head to the Kinshasa Jazz Festival. Until somewhere, at some point, in between the neon green laser show and the beautiful, if lyrically inaccurate, rendition of Rolling in the Deep, it becomes ok to be back here again.</span><br />
<span style="text-align: center;"><br /></span>
<div style="text-align: center;">
***</div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com0tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-20406015199679774742013-04-24T07:22:00.000+01:002013-04-24T07:22:20.095+01:00Yes<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf86Cw3unfata0pj-B4XWRUtCs6vpwoZRMRbDIpmmQoB7nRAT7gbeWNzyRo70Ib-Pt3eW_0PfTOcSmrzx3A90RfFstO2n45XHe4W-eg4EWWf0nHwaB5CkKUZCWTm_WCJNZu8HWO1zKtX0S/s1600/IMG_20130325_225246.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="clear: left; float: left; margin-bottom: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><br /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf86Cw3unfata0pj-B4XWRUtCs6vpwoZRMRbDIpmmQoB7nRAT7gbeWNzyRo70Ib-Pt3eW_0PfTOcSmrzx3A90RfFstO2n45XHe4W-eg4EWWf0nHwaB5CkKUZCWTm_WCJNZu8HWO1zKtX0S/s1600/IMG_20130325_225246.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhf86Cw3unfata0pj-B4XWRUtCs6vpwoZRMRbDIpmmQoB7nRAT7gbeWNzyRo70Ib-Pt3eW_0PfTOcSmrzx3A90RfFstO2n45XHe4W-eg4EWWf0nHwaB5CkKUZCWTm_WCJNZu8HWO1zKtX0S/s1200/IMG_20130325_225246.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">I say yes to everything. </span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Salsa classes, circuits sessions, Downton Abbey evenings, Mexican brunches, rooftop parties, housewarmings of people I've only met once before, historical film groups, quiz nights, impromptu river trips, fabric shopping, a visit to the stables, Bocce matches, French film screenings, poker nights. </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Tennis tournaments, even though I haven't played for over ten years, never had any hand eye coordination in the first place, even though I cannot serve. A trip to the golf course driving range, though the lack of hand eye coordination applies to this too. The after party of the trophy tour of the UEFA cup, despite the fact I'm not into football, that the presence football big names is lost on me.</span></span><br />
<span style="color: #222222;"><br /></span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Barbecues of friends, barbecues of </span><i style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">friends</i><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"> of friends, suddenly no invitation is too far removed, no event is too random. </span><span style="color: #222222;">Because how else, all alone in a new city, country, continent, do you meet people, make friends, build yourself a life? </span><span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;">Certainly not by sitting at home with the Game of Thrones box set, though there's been plenty of that too. And slowly, slowly, as the days and weeks go by, I think it is working.</span><br />
<div style="color: #222222;">
<i><br /></i><span style="font-family: inherit;"></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQMZ9B4mYEw-Xrs_J3gGSNup5oEjeUPW9OccX-Q9-u0q9dcDt56gmYCy5l5FBskHED-fbkStGdXKF8izrm1ybmN6ihMywJK3R3aX9Z6AmaGtAz_L9YAu5wJjxID2RjCzuUpQAvnHqVYl2H/s1600/IMG_20130313_234604.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhQMZ9B4mYEw-Xrs_J3gGSNup5oEjeUPW9OccX-Q9-u0q9dcDt56gmYCy5l5FBskHED-fbkStGdXKF8izrm1ybmN6ihMywJK3R3aX9Z6AmaGtAz_L9YAu5wJjxID2RjCzuUpQAvnHqVYl2H/s1200/IMG_20130313_234604.jpg" width="320" /></a></span></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2-EBlTV6vuNKqO6qf6EwF6GxLH1AB4qQ1PPb9mo3B7B5UPJO9zFDRVPUn9_XJmIGW3nHcjMB9eSi_9zSmKPKAomfFQd4XAXuXCLgLezmxewu8RDO8Dwyy_MIQJKVHowTrwA_mRAXqa7je/s1600/IMG_20130416_225630.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh2-EBlTV6vuNKqO6qf6EwF6GxLH1AB4qQ1PPb9mo3B7B5UPJO9zFDRVPUn9_XJmIGW3nHcjMB9eSi_9zSmKPKAomfFQd4XAXuXCLgLezmxewu8RDO8Dwyy_MIQJKVHowTrwA_mRAXqa7je/s1200/IMG_20130416_225630.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE_RCWphJrgOKjg1hBXjsGkw-XZ3h6jUEgDrzfEBzKkL2jb0T_vPaqrG1dOwYpLLmuC7yOyflTFqhHt9RXl43EFHcVia8Pb620YIFxZKC26JmJjApu9NBaxqEZBb7DVAzT7SuC_gcf6VF3/s1600/IMG_20130423_211030.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE_RCWphJrgOKjg1hBXjsGkw-XZ3h6jUEgDrzfEBzKkL2jb0T_vPaqrG1dOwYpLLmuC7yOyflTFqhHt9RXl43EFHcVia8Pb620YIFxZKC26JmJjApu9NBaxqEZBb7DVAzT7SuC_gcf6VF3/s1200/IMG_20130423_211030.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR-h7x79rPA371urLfcmHoeGqhpEmbmjlXRza09JX3R4B6KYm5ewzQBu7fqH5w4fXv-Pp-KgNTdq9U2tVv1Lhl15GevOJqxLd9Rq6HXDaqal1SMFs8i3zjhQy9Q63Zr4a9VkP7GcEWF4Ht/s1600/IMG_20130423_210733.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgR-h7x79rPA371urLfcmHoeGqhpEmbmjlXRza09JX3R4B6KYm5ewzQBu7fqH5w4fXv-Pp-KgNTdq9U2tVv1Lhl15GevOJqxLd9Rq6HXDaqal1SMFs8i3zjhQy9Q63Zr4a9VkP7GcEWF4Ht/s1200/IMG_20130423_210733.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
</div>
<div style="color: #222222;">
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-73680862302108564732013-04-15T23:15:00.000+01:002013-04-15T23:15:17.139+01:00Snapshot<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAALDGhfJ1L5r2jNrkeUZ0l6wmxFbA35oL21fFDaXvZMM6Ta9jlhsCIPTmdPOwTmboH-tcuirop5ZEihgwWzGK_T5lglQF6uNutJ3QWemshtAN037IUR4bMuWvnxl_4tv-mbNomUes1UyU/s1600/IMG_20130407_214347.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjAALDGhfJ1L5r2jNrkeUZ0l6wmxFbA35oL21fFDaXvZMM6Ta9jlhsCIPTmdPOwTmboH-tcuirop5ZEihgwWzGK_T5lglQF6uNutJ3QWemshtAN037IUR4bMuWvnxl_4tv-mbNomUes1UyU/s1200/IMG_20130407_214347.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222; font-family: inherit;">Here, they call passion fruit maracuya.</span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">There are three different colours of bougainvillea on the walk to the pool alone.</span></span><br />
<br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">Right now it is raining so hard it sounds like the ocean is outside my window. Tomorrow the air will feel fresher, slightly, and there will be pothole puddles of unknown depths on the drive to work. </span></span><br />
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUTa8o6QuqasdmGm-d2CZA-O8LHk9I9fiEOvGYb3W54uewOxgnyWUzUNsYPua9Q-NNN2XrlQs9-aOX1xm-VRj5XoNR7dECa3fWWtFZZaiIcMfV8BNgBEmm6lfHEAQlVVsS3H5J4GOTmWMG/s1600/IMG_20130407_214136.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjUTa8o6QuqasdmGm-d2CZA-O8LHk9I9fiEOvGYb3W54uewOxgnyWUzUNsYPua9Q-NNN2XrlQs9-aOX1xm-VRj5XoNR7dECa3fWWtFZZaiIcMfV8BNgBEmm6lfHEAQlVVsS3H5J4GOTmWMG/s1200/IMG_20130407_214136.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuC1wcjYp3q6ySCOBpMOA5F0CllYdqh7nTVGHGTNTycOCw8fGZMLBY72-QFAUYxRk1rokoBkd5O2zuezBzoV90sOymZoY9Uq-Fh77zzHltm4kNmorkRrMzLUi0mTLNJGQqFdxsvsQ_wNt5/s1600/IMG_20130407_214251.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiuC1wcjYp3q6ySCOBpMOA5F0CllYdqh7nTVGHGTNTycOCw8fGZMLBY72-QFAUYxRk1rokoBkd5O2zuezBzoV90sOymZoY9Uq-Fh77zzHltm4kNmorkRrMzLUi0mTLNJGQqFdxsvsQ_wNt5/s1200/IMG_20130407_214251.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="background-color: white; color: #222222;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com1tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-29198768398613105252013-03-29T18:04:00.000+00:002013-03-29T18:04:23.993+00:00Hot pink, emerald green, Easter weekend<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimjG-WiHPYzr37os0v5Zw0tITh8Z-YdOodhKTgh2Yu_T0sneAyCgPaNNKR4vUU87V4YaJvhgK0l9GJbYzK4TvAlJznpxZguuVvTFhrAz0b708w-PJvNYrn6QJ5J-HUYDJOAdTWtDdGr8ms/s1600/IMG_20130319_234039.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEimjG-WiHPYzr37os0v5Zw0tITh8Z-YdOodhKTgh2Yu_T0sneAyCgPaNNKR4vUU87V4YaJvhgK0l9GJbYzK4TvAlJznpxZguuVvTFhrAz0b708w-PJvNYrn6QJ5J-HUYDJOAdTWtDdGr8ms/s1200/IMG_20130319_234039.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPeCCKDe5F7oNq3PAmIhHeHVrNK72T1BSM3v4Vz3ojitvVVsRdDP90eeVQDZ4CMMpS7lfyxFvjUsEPdiJHiTLwxj3VMnOD1rSSkSZM8XKSJUlfwa0qcrPYGdCbNfIAZoSajpiwsnx07jCb/s1600/IMG_20130317_121655.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhPeCCKDe5F7oNq3PAmIhHeHVrNK72T1BSM3v4Vz3ojitvVVsRdDP90eeVQDZ4CMMpS7lfyxFvjUsEPdiJHiTLwxj3VMnOD1rSSkSZM8XKSJUlfwa0qcrPYGdCbNfIAZoSajpiwsnx07jCb/s1200/IMG_20130317_121655.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
They send me photos of daffodils poking up through snowy ground, tell me they have the heating on still. I send them pictures of hibiscus, tell them about eating papaya for breakfast.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
The lovely <a href="http://dancingbeastie.wordpress.com/">Dancing Beastie</a> (also featuring photographs of <a href="http://dancingbeastie.wordpress.com/2013/03/15/a-snowy-spring/">daffodils and snow</a>) commented on the last post (describing 'frangipani blossoms like heady sunsets', which I just love) and asks if I can tell you where I am. To which the answer is yes, absolutely. I'm in Kinshasa. Congo, Democratic Republic of. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Six weeks tomorrow and I'm still finding it hard to believe that I am here, that this is my home for the next three years. This country is vast, and complex, and there is so much to learn. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Happy Easter weekend to you all, even if mine will be slightly less typical than usual, featuring mosquito repellent and pineapples instead of hot cross buns and spring bulbs.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
***</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
(More pictures of the amazing flora here - flowers which look like sea anemones and are so hot pink as to be almost unbelievable, palm fronds, orchids growing outside (!), oleander cuttings which E brings me from the garden)</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifBx1FKwJghoo3XDLu2SAW__4ck4kN-aphyphenhyphenhsNHCP7kzHOEEq6QYf9w8_AWGV07eYuaJtgnKCVWxzGhqYyUo_crTKxWpXZfRFBdbj6gp8cRSZnvI3g-k7eQ9rXLQVefi8Gsiue2Y2-bslD/s1600/IMG_20130327_183117.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEifBx1FKwJghoo3XDLu2SAW__4ck4kN-aphyphenhyphenhsNHCP7kzHOEEq6QYf9w8_AWGV07eYuaJtgnKCVWxzGhqYyUo_crTKxWpXZfRFBdbj6gp8cRSZnvI3g-k7eQ9rXLQVefi8Gsiue2Y2-bslD/s1200/IMG_20130327_183117.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVsxWwfz1wv5IblRvdCQsRvn_6ybebefbhAHty8MuO7Zh7zWAhoYFgPhZ1ft-t1RrJElN6Iwjt1fahMnEpwN0WQg5thYarN_HsJ2-OA9JZq_jlTNxi5a0zVfj-OqjQC99uUGmK29-uo5E4/s1600/IMG_20130319_233410.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjVsxWwfz1wv5IblRvdCQsRvn_6ybebefbhAHty8MuO7Zh7zWAhoYFgPhZ1ft-t1RrJElN6Iwjt1fahMnEpwN0WQg5thYarN_HsJ2-OA9JZq_jlTNxi5a0zVfj-OqjQC99uUGmK29-uo5E4/s1200/IMG_20130319_233410.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUTidRErMB2S-8Z5tMCJ6yraPPeiBF2nayi4rnRq6kGDZ2gvIjjUhHXRbX43cTaX4w7vfNfdDxAbxEbjvXAqECDMDtrsCsos54FsCPkRv4TRUMxu8FbGIeIF8T6QFyopNnFEgw_ZSw-jeM/s1600/IMG_20130317_120619.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhUTidRErMB2S-8Z5tMCJ6yraPPeiBF2nayi4rnRq6kGDZ2gvIjjUhHXRbX43cTaX4w7vfNfdDxAbxEbjvXAqECDMDtrsCsos54FsCPkRv4TRUMxu8FbGIeIF8T6QFyopNnFEgw_ZSw-jeM/s1200/IMG_20130317_120619.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-33211317288290303342013-03-14T22:40:00.001+00:002013-03-14T22:40:17.178+00:00Sunday at the sandbanks<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbpYizVmBU3lyDaPoM2ulYCmZE1RJGAV8q69LseOjdl2_uoaS12c8PMDa4K4Zbbbf8bd9V41dnjt2bOHHMFWzsqdtZ5bUHsllldqrIsHh4hy-wNl8xFJAPxfTe3oZu5yga3WD5wxMg3bvK/s1600/IMG_20130310_205959.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgbpYizVmBU3lyDaPoM2ulYCmZE1RJGAV8q69LseOjdl2_uoaS12c8PMDa4K4Zbbbf8bd9V41dnjt2bOHHMFWzsqdtZ5bUHsllldqrIsHh4hy-wNl8xFJAPxfTe3oZu5yga3WD5wxMg3bvK/s1200/IMG_20130310_205959.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
We make for the river early Sunday morning, take a couple of boats, a picnic, swimwear, head out to the sandbanks. Eat perfectly ripe papaya, drink juice from the cool box. Listen to the radio. Try to rouse ourselves to a game of frisbee, fail in the heat. Sit in the shallows of the fast flowing water to cool down, far too fast to swim against. Walk the circumference of our little sandbank kingdom, watching the birds, the fishermen with their big nets. Water hyacinths, chlorophyll rich, purple flowered. The river is vast, the water copper coloured. Tiny, translucent fish dart erratically away from bare feet. Watch clouds gather dark on the horizon, above the city, back where we cam from, ominous, the storm never materialising.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I am pink from the sun by the time we leave, and feel like I have been on holiday, sand in my hair, between my toes.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWOnWpCnRcZsd2t2gn1hsIKTCBBIA7skLqgkp4zEG440rlR2vD5yAclYGK6tbqnrbTg9CuQlkvMc8TICqR2CwFAzhuOmiG5NK9pWe9MhPxb8FuXWrI2POOFhBByh-nOGDXGrgwJYlFxPJK/s1600/IMG_20130310_211253.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjWOnWpCnRcZsd2t2gn1hsIKTCBBIA7skLqgkp4zEG440rlR2vD5yAclYGK6tbqnrbTg9CuQlkvMc8TICqR2CwFAzhuOmiG5NK9pWe9MhPxb8FuXWrI2POOFhBByh-nOGDXGrgwJYlFxPJK/s1200/IMG_20130310_211253.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZIvnjQiQwQP2MB_xrWrdLMhLjC0ugUMLu-P3jblxIRqAJrU423i64Nxl_Bo9veHf2AGF5vbeJIiwN4MQbBcAYcMs-yFb8rWXynqiUl60rqcNs8Kr5mc1mWOU4ZwNg4Ti7ijN-k8W7Br4z/s1600/IMG_20130310_205819.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhZIvnjQiQwQP2MB_xrWrdLMhLjC0ugUMLu-P3jblxIRqAJrU423i64Nxl_Bo9veHf2AGF5vbeJIiwN4MQbBcAYcMs-yFb8rWXynqiUl60rqcNs8Kr5mc1mWOU4ZwNg4Ti7ijN-k8W7Br4z/s1200/IMG_20130310_205819.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjeTeHBEbe0SQ5JWnVrwxf-5YzfozOAX_TbKasOggu3TbYw-6YkdUPIoH5bbzmksXE-w4ewurqJJb-bJQcqavQEQld_DJB_NjptgTrAzzqusRJUPwz6RDFmyxXwekzlUpIOjTVv2SlNgD7/s1600/IMG_20130310_204421.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjjeTeHBEbe0SQ5JWnVrwxf-5YzfozOAX_TbKasOggu3TbYw-6YkdUPIoH5bbzmksXE-w4ewurqJJb-bJQcqavQEQld_DJB_NjptgTrAzzqusRJUPwz6RDFmyxXwekzlUpIOjTVv2SlNgD7/s1200/IMG_20130310_204421.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIG0W_n6ezmQ8nG2Ulq9EAwkwc8PcYNxUeIWOM1sG-XsJih21BndtgUNTx-CANx1HGEuHYZBgsh1KOxXDR8x4tkZsH6JNcX5E-TNJrVvn19q6I4YHpQw1cszIGG7pt8EziFCQYmQjvPoA2/s1600/IMG_20130310_210535.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiIG0W_n6ezmQ8nG2Ulq9EAwkwc8PcYNxUeIWOM1sG-XsJih21BndtgUNTx-CANx1HGEuHYZBgsh1KOxXDR8x4tkZsH6JNcX5E-TNJrVvn19q6I4YHpQw1cszIGG7pt8EziFCQYmQjvPoA2/s1200/IMG_20130310_210535.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBKyuEY9UPyG8BTunbgZPbuqsesVHIpR3_y8kB927tDtReznspj5FZtvSJa4-tHSySLDZKor5A4pe2MWDZ6aJnQ2DuZ0ExLGsjMNoSV5RmTR-vcsKByi48NjVmWKiJjDOcYuRZwAjFmHLC/s1600/IMG_20130310_210232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjBKyuEY9UPyG8BTunbgZPbuqsesVHIpR3_y8kB927tDtReznspj5FZtvSJa4-tHSySLDZKor5A4pe2MWDZ6aJnQ2DuZ0ExLGsjMNoSV5RmTR-vcsKByi48NjVmWKiJjDOcYuRZwAjFmHLC/s1200/IMG_20130310_210232.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiID0NeYogTWqbgk88qoVmWpU0Gb9npERUZMvpBgTtGmK5Ij9Nx5Cd2nKcSkrTZyda-CN5SftHl0wHNwj8nXovtAPmaRXmfScxBMWSKipe4s6hXpcTIuYpUtVL-OAGRZbSwRK0Vu7-nfwUu/s1600/IMG_20130310_205232.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiID0NeYogTWqbgk88qoVmWpU0Gb9npERUZMvpBgTtGmK5Ij9Nx5Cd2nKcSkrTZyda-CN5SftHl0wHNwj8nXovtAPmaRXmfScxBMWSKipe4s6hXpcTIuYpUtVL-OAGRZbSwRK0Vu7-nfwUu/s1200/IMG_20130310_205232.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbt-YlQe1kH_oSPC3kbz_Xx10l4LJI4w7j7SHbDqI2wcMuxztamKsD9HJ6pBi_Hz0pJo7I6uvlLBmpv4l0EgWw_-uzr31o38QBQx9VU8loJDKdPOHcbiIXpXQ_CgC7lyKqoCj4hFa9CxN/s1600/IMG_20130310_203216.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiZbt-YlQe1kH_oSPC3kbz_Xx10l4LJI4w7j7SHbDqI2wcMuxztamKsD9HJ6pBi_Hz0pJo7I6uvlLBmpv4l0EgWw_-uzr31o38QBQx9VU8loJDKdPOHcbiIXpXQ_CgC7lyKqoCj4hFa9CxN/s1200/IMG_20130310_203216.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVV_u7Sg5GYL5QFVUjGwbpuK1QFVYc3TkpG4H68RjvT5wWBfU142GU6x3t8bmootKA8btmUaJC3xDlxwvZfdXRFe7RrDJSaYTg8irpdovccPMvScpB6ell7wCPN6fPTlx436CW0ktuREqb/s1600/IMG_20130310_210124.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgVV_u7Sg5GYL5QFVUjGwbpuK1QFVYc3TkpG4H68RjvT5wWBfU142GU6x3t8bmootKA8btmUaJC3xDlxwvZfdXRFe7RrDJSaYTg8irpdovccPMvScpB6ell7wCPN6fPTlx436CW0ktuREqb/s1200/IMG_20130310_210124.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAUot0XDlQumz09wSUIfwArbDmyswUA5VKsgPkcSbGBskKcIVGP92pnCuqDHXit8oAniIhNAG6JOPyP3NRWquluHqbapzlnc9gQfjavcEhPEm5fzFhAzY99YihXsGD2rkWUCnYrGs2xdld/s1600/IMG_20130310_203758.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgAUot0XDlQumz09wSUIfwArbDmyswUA5VKsgPkcSbGBskKcIVGP92pnCuqDHXit8oAniIhNAG6JOPyP3NRWquluHqbapzlnc9gQfjavcEhPEm5fzFhAzY99YihXsGD2rkWUCnYrGs2xdld/s1200/IMG_20130310_203758.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE9E0S3QXrIw6Gm0T3OhnefHxC9TkI8AMDhPYbmB_Jo-FooWSG5zkOkIkE9rDpZpImLWvXvaYo35EFxhnuYS7sh0U8u4m3_NcjNktp8TSV4qQPlrKTXwl7chgSgKO7QXUfj0GQsmpt9kza/s1600/IMG_20130310_203512.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiE9E0S3QXrIw6Gm0T3OhnefHxC9TkI8AMDhPYbmB_Jo-FooWSG5zkOkIkE9rDpZpImLWvXvaYo35EFxhnuYS7sh0U8u4m3_NcjNktp8TSV4qQPlrKTXwl7chgSgKO7QXUfj0GQsmpt9kza/s1200/IMG_20130310_203512.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com7tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-74659570278820964222013-03-11T22:13:00.000+00:002013-03-11T22:13:27.770+00:00So far<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirrJVN72cRilA0a4AsPrfce6tbkAYoW7SFuED6b-eY3-ksCIdgciu0VHO9QqIU-juxTsD-Ul8r_fAPDowJKl02aHIFLOHV3UFhcsbJYLW69TZvxw1dltVecyPVe1oSo_Bed4bRKA_8Erg_/s1600/IMG_20130226_212456.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEirrJVN72cRilA0a4AsPrfce6tbkAYoW7SFuED6b-eY3-ksCIdgciu0VHO9QqIU-juxTsD-Ul8r_fAPDowJKl02aHIFLOHV3UFhcsbJYLW69TZvxw1dltVecyPVe1oSo_Bed4bRKA_8Erg_/s1200/IMG_20130226_212456.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
The heat, which hits you when you step out of buildings, out of cars, from the air-conditioned cool, hits you like walking into a sauna, water just thrown onto the coals, the air warm and woody. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Butterflies as big as small birds, birds as small as butterflies.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Swimming in the pool, flame tree above, red flowers, green leaves. Dragonflies which dip and hover. Long legged white birds flying overhead, in formation. Must buy a bird book. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Must buy a flower book too, because for the first time in my life, my mother's daughter, I no longer know the plants instinctively, can no longer say, snowdrop, lily-of-the-valley, pansy, ranunculus. I can say with conviction hibiscus, oleander, tentatively frangipani, but then there are the giant, star-like almost jasmine, and the bright yellow flowers which look like a child's drawing, cartoonish in quality, the pom poms of red and orange outside my front door, the creeping feathery vine that closes its leaves upon touch, and I am lost in the unfamiliar.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Lizards which dart from light to shade, and then are still, watching. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Papaya and pineapple, stacked for sale on the roadside, bunches of blackening bananas. New types of fruit, the mangosteen, reddish purple, a new taste, but close to lychee. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj84LJd69JgTgYjvLoaeFYjerN4l9v3bvqoxfy8ea6jwAVnnWrG1igLa3TsrXMHGdQ2gpL2wbFgcQf0QFDlz0coZLuuaivhhgaemMEacEOYSEq7_HOoulVDeBBD3PAx4YWF_-fEjMs6L8Cc/s1600/IMG_20130303_215034.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEj84LJd69JgTgYjvLoaeFYjerN4l9v3bvqoxfy8ea6jwAVnnWrG1igLa3TsrXMHGdQ2gpL2wbFgcQf0QFDlz0coZLuuaivhhgaemMEacEOYSEq7_HOoulVDeBBD3PAx4YWF_-fEjMs6L8Cc/s1200/IMG_20130303_215034.jpg" width="319" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTSknlZ99VM_8-6demvPsmhpDDkLx2VcT8yPs8ehu5bJLOkijUzw5oj8cgEr8SAfBR59_McImtObX7h0CKvVw7O5KKkxiYTTuff4Tiy9e2DofVUOY3kS1yokY-csusEgRvDRjyUFa4QC0W/s1600/IMG_20130227_232334.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjTSknlZ99VM_8-6demvPsmhpDDkLx2VcT8yPs8ehu5bJLOkijUzw5oj8cgEr8SAfBR59_McImtObX7h0CKvVw7O5KKkxiYTTuff4Tiy9e2DofVUOY3kS1yokY-csusEgRvDRjyUFa4QC0W/s1200/IMG_20130227_232334.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWanZ5yiHv4wjjUqSddgJzKzd3adzpTcsfUBH-WGWOtAYBD4M1z_750oJu-0vGzjHiUbBCyrvTgHZZ-_vn4g1qtx_LydRSHq29b30_VSe5b7hBEH3tL28gLpnp074k8dFZ4cxO6eoL2Sgm/s1600/IMG_20130302_182312.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhWanZ5yiHv4wjjUqSddgJzKzd3adzpTcsfUBH-WGWOtAYBD4M1z_750oJu-0vGzjHiUbBCyrvTgHZZ-_vn4g1qtx_LydRSHq29b30_VSe5b7hBEH3tL28gLpnp074k8dFZ4cxO6eoL2Sgm/s1200/IMG_20130302_182312.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqsZfaegGR_FzFE7iP7xWjgowqMPswDVqwfpK_cqiQGM_LA1z9SUhXbm-a2-N2ARzk4RsUfSIAM4QjizYXLGPqAiklLdIUoO4yNxphuqfpPDIN6vRk8b2P0hPy3vwZv1dLS0MLgvyLP8LJ/s1600/IMG_20130303_181328.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgqsZfaegGR_FzFE7iP7xWjgowqMPswDVqwfpK_cqiQGM_LA1z9SUhXbm-a2-N2ARzk4RsUfSIAM4QjizYXLGPqAiklLdIUoO4yNxphuqfpPDIN6vRk8b2P0hPy3vwZv1dLS0MLgvyLP8LJ/s1200/IMG_20130303_181328.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjomx1AbvXrqUVpIjTgKDt8xxjme27leUDysjcEHxYuTcdWaCsZ9G931vWmnTM6EbJ3daLsM9tMNhbS1lJNScE-dC50C6qzfAi3ymeRqY0numhvkB6iPxULbiRLzQlCgyvX8XCiUZ6E75r8/s1600/IMG_20130307_182936.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjomx1AbvXrqUVpIjTgKDt8xxjme27leUDysjcEHxYuTcdWaCsZ9G931vWmnTM6EbJ3daLsM9tMNhbS1lJNScE-dC50C6qzfAi3ymeRqY0numhvkB6iPxULbiRLzQlCgyvX8XCiUZ6E75r8/s1200/IMG_20130307_182936.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg-nL2Qt6JKQw25u56QNYhBLP5OBaGjqfyriVfbzAuuJTvHWuHpI_ZOx9Bn0DwLKD41kTlJ1TYSAFCRuYI16X0NWwgZut-TFZG9ROZIFvpV0vCIyPq4P5h5ZHU7MPI4Pk1WNN2qWJJT5Kb/s1600/IMG_20130224_180847.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhg-nL2Qt6JKQw25u56QNYhBLP5OBaGjqfyriVfbzAuuJTvHWuHpI_ZOx9Bn0DwLKD41kTlJ1TYSAFCRuYI16X0NWwgZut-TFZG9ROZIFvpV0vCIyPq4P5h5ZHU7MPI4Pk1WNN2qWJJT5Kb/s1200/IMG_20130224_180847.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-46430680149974683122013-02-24T21:00:00.000+00:002013-02-24T21:00:09.556+00:00Arrival<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju8DlHcM52WAyufISX3GCSpJoUlVEpDMygAV6Nj13Wloxxjfi-RtZ-C5NqE05aGDy-pLPK386Y17ow38SgnEi_3DtksJP8ZJ13Obt5VYhjGvjIL5zrPzWFh_Rr86MeU7369dXahhzRm3DB/s1600/IMG_20130221_000111.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEju8DlHcM52WAyufISX3GCSpJoUlVEpDMygAV6Nj13Wloxxjfi-RtZ-C5NqE05aGDy-pLPK386Y17ow38SgnEi_3DtksJP8ZJ13Obt5VYhjGvjIL5zrPzWFh_Rr86MeU7369dXahhzRm3DB/s1200/IMG_20130221_000111.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I arrived a week ago yesterday. Left a cold, bright London, flew through the night. Arrived to the heat and the sunshine, the dust, the mirages on tarmac.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I already feel like I have been here far longer than a week. I am reminded of the <a href="http://www.independent.co.uk/arts-entertainment/books--contemporary-poets-12-maura-dooley-1543354.html">Maura Dooley poem</a>, History, and its opening: <i>It's only a week but already you are slipping... </i>London and her cold February days seeming a long way away. The missing of people, places, is there, yes, but also the relief, after the months of preparation, to be here, finally. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
To have arrived. </div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXVL9k-McIQ-ixxdmHUQXOLBF09ymXVTEaVpEb5HFwGJ5Pjt5irP-RbMUo70g70erYdZHdhGyuTY1hGB140x2ekEvNlhsR0YokUWSEXRAX7ClOpqkGelSd0VZbsIlh7MLGn4EQOKbJ4Ipw/s1600/IMG_20130223_181410.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjXVL9k-McIQ-ixxdmHUQXOLBF09ymXVTEaVpEb5HFwGJ5Pjt5irP-RbMUo70g70erYdZHdhGyuTY1hGB140x2ekEvNlhsR0YokUWSEXRAX7ClOpqkGelSd0VZbsIlh7MLGn4EQOKbJ4Ipw/s1200/IMG_20130223_181410.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDW-SwzJu_bQ_M7xmZv7akPr18h26NXaO9PWDeuCY3-F9fxE_T56bbsp6LZhsC_GFHHGdbwwOgfXUlMlYw8h4fdkzX_Fd76JT0RJtsrkENI5wEJhvuuNmBmTXj3zhsvYk4Rx8rM_W5q-Vb/s1600/IMG_20130224_180233.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhDW-SwzJu_bQ_M7xmZv7akPr18h26NXaO9PWDeuCY3-F9fxE_T56bbsp6LZhsC_GFHHGdbwwOgfXUlMlYw8h4fdkzX_Fd76JT0RJtsrkENI5wEJhvuuNmBmTXj3zhsvYk4Rx8rM_W5q-Vb/s1200/IMG_20130224_180233.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgy3VTuFNONMjKDTG4faG5iwnLxnfwp3BrDzR-lozuZjncHBo6bb7OAZHHhFJpfcCbFx6JG0YZnD8wqWiaxzS_esB1PC-dZTjNgvEY3A9lsNj4aVqLC_zoqlog-ah5rsn_ixm1YbgbLi4GC/s1600/IMG_20130216_224326.jpg" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="square" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgy3VTuFNONMjKDTG4faG5iwnLxnfwp3BrDzR-lozuZjncHBo6bb7OAZHHhFJpfcCbFx6JG0YZnD8wqWiaxzS_esB1PC-dZTjNgvEY3A9lsNj4aVqLC_zoqlog-ah5rsn_ixm1YbgbLi4GC/s1200/IMG_20130216_224326.jpg" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com4tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-48573966435930698552013-01-15T23:52:00.000+00:002013-01-15T23:52:54.712+00:00For H<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin2vhms3hYxZj2mXtoU4jV6g5umeRgRaTkrWdCXlvERcFq9A1_LQeobTtsheismqfujPkQ9SoYCxorqMLz6An3JvE82WgMJk65-ItNPlaanPz6aSQibrcQX5oN2b3beqDZZB7a9mIHoIZu/s1600/New+York+724.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEin2vhms3hYxZj2mXtoU4jV6g5umeRgRaTkrWdCXlvERcFq9A1_LQeobTtsheismqfujPkQ9SoYCxorqMLz6An3JvE82WgMJk65-ItNPlaanPz6aSQibrcQX5oN2b3beqDZZB7a9mIHoIZu/s1200/New+York+724.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaZxGKTzMQ4xFKNvQRTi-kd-fL7Al5excGmx8CXYu7VTw0CcG6DVlqu0cGcKdnxyicWK_N2TsbRml0XQ_qS8C3oex7sc0WNASiP4rbSeUZiJTNQREHaZzvHivZOxG3HIzjwTnOaMl0Qaje/s1600/New+York+272.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhaZxGKTzMQ4xFKNvQRTi-kd-fL7Al5excGmx8CXYu7VTw0CcG6DVlqu0cGcKdnxyicWK_N2TsbRml0XQ_qS8C3oex7sc0WNASiP4rbSeUZiJTNQREHaZzvHivZOxG3HIzjwTnOaMl0Qaje/s1200/New+York+272.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;">You're flying to New York tomorrow, to a new job, a new life.</span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span>
I'll miss you. We've had such fun in London, you and I.<br />
<br />
Saying goodbye, yesterday evening in Kings Cross tube station, saying<i> I'll see you....</i>and then tailing off because this time the usual '<i>soon</i>' isn't there, was hard.<br />
<br />
Mid-hug, into your ear, I say<br />
<i><br /></i>
<i>You're going to have an A-MAZING time. </i><br />
<i><br /></i>
And I mean it, truly, picturing you drooling over <a href="http://www.amymerrick.com/">these flowers</a>, reading (and loving as much as I do) <a href="http://bigbangstudio.blogspot.co.uk/">this blog</a>, buying this <a href="http://www.saipua.com/shop/">soap</a>, making <a href="http://smittenkitchen.com/">these recipes</a> (complete with sticks of butter and cups of flour, cilantro not coriander, arugula instead of rocket, eggplant to replace aubergine).<br />
<br />
Drinking cocktails in <a href="http://www.raineslawroom.com/">this cocktail bar</a>, which I still dream about. Walking the <a href="http://www.thehighline.org/">High Line</a> in all seasons.<br />
<br />
I want you to do all of the cliches, slices of pizza off paper plates, getting lost in the Met, the breathtaking views from Empire State and Rockefeller. And then go beyond the cliches, walking and breathing and discovering the city in a way that is only possible by fully living in it.<br />
<br />
<i>You're going to have an amazing time too </i>you whisper back.<br />
<br />
***<br />
<br />
Yes...but there sure as hell won't be as many Reese's peanut butter cups where I'm going.<br />
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ0jO01rwBA5UKhjs0ZBamjXat6HzgQoXz31HVCy76HDBOnz_gP-ZHUmYFwMXF59w5bbtaChqmzSS_fmAP8I99eadvVzFlTrDr2QRLJkQzN-ySqy8crGDm1_24814wvjPMgqcrIef5vK8W/s1600/New+York+253.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiJ0jO01rwBA5UKhjs0ZBamjXat6HzgQoXz31HVCy76HDBOnz_gP-ZHUmYFwMXF59w5bbtaChqmzSS_fmAP8I99eadvVzFlTrDr2QRLJkQzN-ySqy8crGDm1_24814wvjPMgqcrIef5vK8W/s1200/New+York+253.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF6kx2z36Y59xTzKp41suxMBve9ga1ryLXzvW1TV_I0wJ2mBQBsZoDL_NIbH3IHQwwPt_xmLYyigYP6ykyMt1HeKxdQbs-bp8GhljR97ElW6n-BSUHDqMha6TsxnqfH_G3u7HgQ-oymEHq/s1600/New+York+454.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhF6kx2z36Y59xTzKp41suxMBve9ga1ryLXzvW1TV_I0wJ2mBQBsZoDL_NIbH3IHQwwPt_xmLYyigYP6ykyMt1HeKxdQbs-bp8GhljR97ElW6n-BSUHDqMha6TsxnqfH_G3u7HgQ-oymEHq/s1200/New+York+454.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-2451189855910542352013-01-04T10:32:00.000+00:002013-01-04T10:32:01.769+00:00Conversations from a move<div>
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6BgK_FzHmrlNdHWF17926L_Xg5dBZbvyx2KNz4c6HxUi24Q4c8po1Gr5fM6tc_NRqfDnqXMThToB6ZaB2iWYFNsxesxL7L_MELKISbyPtnN5tZprecfdhUoirgMIyC-nuG8tZ-AanEppl/s1600/IMG_2480.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEh6BgK_FzHmrlNdHWF17926L_Xg5dBZbvyx2KNz4c6HxUi24Q4c8po1Gr5fM6tc_NRqfDnqXMThToB6ZaB2iWYFNsxesxL7L_MELKISbyPtnN5tZprecfdhUoirgMIyC-nuG8tZ-AanEppl/s1200/IMG_2480.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<br />
Mum: I've laid out some kitchen stuff, just take anything you think you might want.<br />
Me: Okay, great, thanks.<br />
[later]<br />
Mum: You haven't taken the corn skewers!<br />
Me: Um, not sure I'll need them where I'm going?<br />
Mum: But you might have corn on the cob!<br />
Me: Yes, but I can just use my hands, like I do normally.<br />
Mum: How about this?<br />
[holds up unidentifiable utensil, a wooden handle with a wire loop on the end]<br />
Me: What is it?<br />
Mum: I'm not sure. Possibly for cutting the tops off eggs....or, yes, this is it, it's for lifting boiled eggs out of the pan. Might be useful.<br />
Me: What's wrong with a spoon!?Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com6tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-88228770556546106672012-12-23T23:25:00.003+00:002012-12-23T23:25:42.307+00:00Because it's Christmas...<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikX8GMmn0UKvX3Ou4bA3zbDTtbc3oaTamUatMf3r29E_-cdJZvk5XrAkBU3db0Ar9Hztd5-WmyacxYxKTfPfs-EVNnrQ7mmAILqpcCQpLEbCMfu_IMw6YKQpfnTGN8t_Xs0bOmIsLb16WT/s1600/IMG_0342.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" class="portrait" height="320" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikX8GMmn0UKvX3Ou4bA3zbDTtbc3oaTamUatMf3r29E_-cdJZvk5XrAkBU3db0Ar9Hztd5-WmyacxYxKTfPfs-EVNnrQ7mmAILqpcCQpLEbCMfu_IMw6YKQpfnTGN8t_Xs0bOmIsLb16WT/s1200/IMG_0342.JPG" width="213" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
...I give you...deer. Okay, so these photos were taken in September, in 35 degree heat, in Japan, and they are deer rather than reindeer, but just look at their faces, those liquid eyes, the velvety antlers. There's something <i>slightly</i> festive about them. And really, who wouldn't want to find one of these beauties under the Christmas tree?</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
I'm up in Norfolk for Christmas, enjoying doing nothing very much at all.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
Hope you all have a lovely festive period.</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
x</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
p.s. Thank you for all your kind comments on my <a href="http://www.teacupscupcakes.blogspot.co.uk/2012/11/all-things-they-said.html">last post</a>, very much appreciated!</div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJyqFCGGNYhhnL75SXYmQoNyzIFb7yeCSjYOWq3QfJ_qBKoD65PI1XEfob-tn9R7RWXvYqOciU84K5ejjcZycYLWOFZU9AZuAMoIJY1VQ-F07lsydlgE2smfrd_xilIOcDxXhQeOE9ba_x/s1600/IMG_0139.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEgJyqFCGGNYhhnL75SXYmQoNyzIFb7yeCSjYOWq3QfJ_qBKoD65PI1XEfob-tn9R7RWXvYqOciU84K5ejjcZycYLWOFZU9AZuAMoIJY1VQ-F07lsydlgE2smfrd_xilIOcDxXhQeOE9ba_x/s1200/IMG_0139.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_YUGoFBPgriMlIW26SKHT0xXZxIZ4IDLJpyGmIWjN6U5zZXo1zq1xpamzLuGeuaP7knWFD6oxzIj9zXJfhAPeH9mwBs12u2CWLtkGORW8TwHCfqZsnfkz7jZInfMxMq2GwZ2GPEpobvv5/s1600/IMG_0126.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg_YUGoFBPgriMlIW26SKHT0xXZxIZ4IDLJpyGmIWjN6U5zZXo1zq1xpamzLuGeuaP7knWFD6oxzIj9zXJfhAPeH9mwBs12u2CWLtkGORW8TwHCfqZsnfkz7jZInfMxMq2GwZ2GPEpobvv5/s1200/IMG_0126.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNiYkrp5lgEEd7wbR6_QSoVrdGdyZ4qQmIB2UUGaniPbs9jmVA2XylPhEgIkDk2a3S6rU8lg3wf3qdNMHsfKyLb3-isY5ckd04KwC58HNhqLHEbbVvtac_cbta0w11pDDjWVaKupzDZNNn/s1600/IMG_0885.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhNiYkrp5lgEEd7wbR6_QSoVrdGdyZ4qQmIB2UUGaniPbs9jmVA2XylPhEgIkDk2a3S6rU8lg3wf3qdNMHsfKyLb3-isY5ckd04KwC58HNhqLHEbbVvtac_cbta0w11pDDjWVaKupzDZNNn/s1200/IMG_0885.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBzs6I9Py9XrNT5mXgviqbMsrQ0_BQvCGXgKc1wddeZ6FluR94NSAzQkh2gOkpTakJBDRYHk0EAUuTShbw9rSxiSOT-1dVsvQF2cImlJGP5-5MVsZcyLaK7zpIItOxPqeYEpvLFDoZ9_qz/s1600/IMG_0861.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhBzs6I9Py9XrNT5mXgviqbMsrQ0_BQvCGXgKc1wddeZ6FluR94NSAzQkh2gOkpTakJBDRYHk0EAUuTShbw9rSxiSOT-1dVsvQF2cImlJGP5-5MVsZcyLaK7zpIItOxPqeYEpvLFDoZ9_qz/s1200/IMG_0861.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikmYLa0pJYwL_h5sS600F3ks7mXU17YLJdtysY5ga3QwyI4SFKV_0IGJL-B2JrMPrn6WD1oKhpGKWjv4R4CbIR4g9nHAN8g2GgwYqBjHcP33JoOnuwmjKhhxRZVEYdDoinfXWKkJmn0pyg/s1600/IMG_0811.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEikmYLa0pJYwL_h5sS600F3ks7mXU17YLJdtysY5ga3QwyI4SFKV_0IGJL-B2JrMPrn6WD1oKhpGKWjv4R4CbIR4g9nHAN8g2GgwYqBjHcP33JoOnuwmjKhhxRZVEYdDoinfXWKkJmn0pyg/s1200/IMG_0811.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPno9gsq2tj5bQ7f3ArRsLCY1d8rTR1T6D1GAM3re4yT4Qod3L4niKSCJ-W-Gi5v6WkhkRpOUdwEtrbiC6COIuy74Ix1DGrn16KWduPmDjfovZcTYPdK0VFrFIwIBHpatBP1kur0Rhrez4/s1600/IMG_0124.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjPno9gsq2tj5bQ7f3ArRsLCY1d8rTR1T6D1GAM3re4yT4Qod3L4niKSCJ-W-Gi5v6WkhkRpOUdwEtrbiC6COIuy74Ix1DGrn16KWduPmDjfovZcTYPdK0VFrFIwIBHpatBP1kur0Rhrez4/s1200/IMG_0124.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhet4L8e2du9QcwXpbLISnniEsoqIlU8mI-uGnoGG8bP80NxUpk6Hw4Gon78NxSrSRn04cLG9eBP7MxC4xGW6EJEm3i8lkn6ueeR7jzjq8uNZ0IB0sGAa_xYcpJ3KUpupMjMkgDPMFy6s3-/s1600/IMG_0817.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhet4L8e2du9QcwXpbLISnniEsoqIlU8mI-uGnoGG8bP80NxUpk6Hw4Gon78NxSrSRn04cLG9eBP7MxC4xGW6EJEm3i8lkn6ueeR7jzjq8uNZ0IB0sGAa_xYcpJ3KUpupMjMkgDPMFy6s3-/s1200/IMG_0817.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3gdm1V5DWR6p-PwPOFbPADe2OWTdUdtpJ6BFzs2wtp1g9Jv1KVqDoZcP5blzbae60Yq1YCp40r9AZ9-RJoZ0w9_QR90uEBmr9f7BxhbmFZE_9yfRyOE0q41xn95UITrjkwMq1gvGxfVWK/s1600/IMG_0869.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEi3gdm1V5DWR6p-PwPOFbPADe2OWTdUdtpJ6BFzs2wtp1g9Jv1KVqDoZcP5blzbae60Yq1YCp40r9AZ9-RJoZ0w9_QR90uEBmr9f7BxhbmFZE_9yfRyOE0q41xn95UITrjkwMq1gvGxfVWK/s1200/IMG_0869.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyy8aengSAhw4YdFZI5-d3WicTyAkYQ9FcujwRHkDu0k3uXu2EeXQUgiR1Y3mD_HeO9Wr2sgnJjc9gWK7bXjux4hMFSc2t_L5ISD1Jy0S45OXYpqg8kxTQIbMOLumBeZhQtwXsm3rQLxkB/s1600/IMG_0785.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEiyy8aengSAhw4YdFZI5-d3WicTyAkYQ9FcujwRHkDu0k3uXu2EeXQUgiR1Y3mD_HeO9Wr2sgnJjc9gWK7bXjux4hMFSc2t_L5ISD1Jy0S45OXYpqg8kxTQIbMOLumBeZhQtwXsm3rQLxkB/s1200/IMG_0785.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIVf08C_NJJyw4LPdnv9gRaO32MF4NGHb3NE1D_VejVpmen_Ynvvjy7lxLXvFs9DptUe75BGATOhncd4sXNsgv23_K8_IdT562f_KUycB8eM8S3KIqpGDepBsJpZKsQ9ryVpWHszow5hwF/s1600/IMG_0040.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEjIVf08C_NJJyw4LPdnv9gRaO32MF4NGHb3NE1D_VejVpmen_Ynvvjy7lxLXvFs9DptUe75BGATOhncd4sXNsgv23_K8_IdT562f_KUycB8eM8S3KIqpGDepBsJpZKsQ9ryVpWHszow5hwF/s1200/IMG_0040.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<br /></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbTlPEqcLpL9GrUdi3OtCgaQ7xPu4D5te4jxTx2YEH5E7R9_tKRqAFWXiYCAqg3jMIfQ4cviegxVI2IJYv-zmetSSDmmFhqvKvMpRkn3KE9CEO7egdbcEsoHhPO7WmnGbvLtTripsuBw-c/s1600/IMG_0879.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhbTlPEqcLpL9GrUdi3OtCgaQ7xPu4D5te4jxTx2YEH5E7R9_tKRqAFWXiYCAqg3jMIfQ4cviegxVI2IJYv-zmetSSDmmFhqvKvMpRkn3KE9CEO7egdbcEsoHhPO7WmnGbvLtTripsuBw-c/s1200/IMG_0879.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com3tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-820394466151260658.post-63313185086802247752012-11-29T21:57:00.000+00:002012-11-29T21:57:26.325+00:00All the things they said<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<i>(Or: if your dreams don't scare you, they're not big enough)</i></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: left;">
<i><br /></i></div>
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1bCDYbsS-AqewwcyK62iaa5fm7Z0teq92E54TgwZjtgs8QO1WmLMUpjeNDvLlShXz93KcmQKX7bMt6siZGzFPXT8Go7SmwnkacxS4A4I83T2sA7a6G5Oy9dkFftFRvSchr-t_Dhf7B6j5/s1600/IMG_8764.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em; text-align: center;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEg1bCDYbsS-AqewwcyK62iaa5fm7Z0teq92E54TgwZjtgs8QO1WmLMUpjeNDvLlShXz93KcmQKX7bMt6siZGzFPXT8Go7SmwnkacxS4A4I83T2sA7a6G5Oy9dkFftFRvSchr-t_Dhf7B6j5/s1200/IMG_8764.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;">August. A beer garden, halfway between Camden and Kentish Town, the inky blue almost-darkness shifting to soft orange light as outdoor heating slowly turned itself off then on. A burger, with strawberry jam, a raucous birthday group behind us. </span><i style="font-family: inherit;">Everything I've ever done that at first scared me, that I wasn't sure about doing, ultimately ended up being the best things.</i><span style="font-family: inherit;"> These same words, said again, another day, another week, at 2am in the rain, the decision already made, but still, it is a reaffirmation, and reassures, because I know the same is true for me.</span></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><span style="font-family: inherit;"><br /></span></span>
<br />
<div class="separator" style="clear: both; text-align: center;">
<a href="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhExXfsZfgKRzDIz8ccYI_G7UZAJnQeQ-PKPjkrhVMNBzMtT2vQ639ZA11NFeEPQFY9M7In1WEtTtjnluagA4uXePc45KVR4cXYNQDuV8aQhVPQqoLj_hJo6GVDIW4Fmp2rgp453VdwBFZB/s1600/IMG_9083.JPG" imageanchor="1" style="margin-left: 1em; margin-right: 1em;"><img border="0" height="213" src="https://blogger.googleusercontent.com/img/b/R29vZ2xl/AVvXsEhExXfsZfgKRzDIz8ccYI_G7UZAJnQeQ-PKPjkrhVMNBzMtT2vQ639ZA11NFeEPQFY9M7In1WEtTtjnluagA4uXePc45KVR4cXYNQDuV8aQhVPQqoLj_hJo6GVDIW4Fmp2rgp453VdwBFZB/s1200/IMG_9083.JPG" width="320" /></a></div>
<br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;">My kitchen, strip lighting, scraggly basil plants hanging on from summer. Hands damp from washing up, turning to grab a tea-towel. The post Japan jet-lag still prickling behind my eyelids. <i>I think everyone has an adventure in their lives, and this could just be yours.</i></span><br />
<span style="font-family: inherit;"><i><br /></i></span>
At work, in a bare meeting room, with my line manager, creaky chair. Notebook in hand, pen poised, and then realising there isn't any need to write. <i>I find you regret the things in life which you don't do, far more than the things you do. </i>Well that I know is true, from hard experience.<br />
<br />
An email, picked up on my phone on a bright Wednesday morning in September, walking to work, leaves turning, air cooler and crisper than I've felt in weeks. <i>I haven't regretted it for a second.</i><br />
<br />
All these things, written, spoken, and from them a decision, a decision which was my gut feeling all along, but just needed coaxing.<br />
<br />
In the new year, I'm moving overseas with work, to Africa. I'm a little bit scared about how big a step this is, a little bit daunted by all I have to do between now and then, but the overriding feeling is a brilliant, delicious excitement.<br />
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>
<span style="font-family: arial; font-size: x-small;"><br /></span>
Beckyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/13788737811998636748noreply@blogger.com19